So The Return of Bruce Wayne just concluded, bringing Gotham’s first son back into the DC Universe. But other than returning the original caped crusader, not much in the series is explicitly described. There’s time travel and hunter-killer metaphors and self-aware concepts and even Satanic rituals. There’s more room for interpretation in this miniseries than most event-books I’m come across recently.

Hoping to find some answers, I stumbled upon a post by geraldthesloth at the Comic Vine forums. If I’m not mistaken, his theory (which was posted back in May) is as such: Barbatos/Thomas Wayne/Dr. Hurt is Darkseid reborn and Batman is Orion reborn.

In other words, Batman is a Fifth World God.

Six months later, geraldthesloth‘s theory only makes more sense. If you’re at all interested in the cross-section of comics and mythology and the ever-evolving use of narrative to understand the world around us, give the guy’s ideas a read.

[source]

Entertainment Tonight is going to drop the first Green Lantern trailer on our asses next Tuesday. This is ahead of it premiering with part one of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hollows. Well!, being in the time we live in, there’s a teaser trailer for the trailer that is going to air on Entertainment Weekly. A box inside a box inside a box inside a box, or something?

Off the cuff impressions? I didn’t like Ryan Reynolds as the Green Lantern when he was cast. And I dig the dude in the right role. This teaser? It’s miniscule, and far from enough to judge with, but since I’m going to anyways? Not digging his delivery. It isn’t Hal Jordan, it’s Ryan Reynolds playing Ryan Reynolds, as he is almost always wont to do.

Hit the jump to check out the trailer. And then hit the comments box with your thoughts and impressions on what can fairly be described as far too little to judge something with. [But let’s do it anyways.]

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Oh god dammit. February solicitations in Previews have the teaser: Death of Spider-Man. I can’t wait for a big character in the DC and Marvel Universe living to become the New Black. Everyone will be shitting themselves, “Dude, I can’t believe they fucking let Steve Rogers live!, it was insane!” I’m tired of motherfuckers dying. Steve Rogers, Bruce Wayne, it looks like Matt Murdock and on and on. ‘Cause guess what! Them fucks come back! Every time. Now it’s Peter Parker’s turn to die. Yawn. Snore. Wake me up.

Prediction: I’m hoping that Marvel isn’t annoying enough to kill off Parker. They’re just going to have to resurrect him prior to his movie coming out. So instead, they’ll probably and maybe, and sort of go with the equally annoying metaphorical death. Parker may give up the costume again. For the zillionth time. Of course. He’ll get all emo and decide he wants to tour Haiti or something and help with the cholera outbreak. Or maybe, it’s just a bullshit teaser and nothing will come of it.

Conclusion: I’m pretty sure whatever they decide, it’ll be stupid. Overblown. Hype.

Thoughts? Impressions? Equally resigned laments as myself? Hit the comments box.

Apparently, there’s two major female roles that Christopher Nolan is currently casting for the next Batman flick, The Dark Knight Rises. One of them is going to be a love interest, and the other is going to be a fucking villain! Good Jesus Christ, could Talia al Ghul really be entering Nolan’s Batverse? Pepsibones and I are silently splooging at the possibility.

Anyways!, want the short list of actors Nolan’s allegedly looking at? That’s why you’re fucking here!

io9:

Rachel Weisz
Naomi Watts
Blake Lively
Natalie Portman
Anne Hathaway
Keira Knightley

Thoughts? Reactions on the list? I’d be like a fucking pig in shit if they could pull Portman or Weisz into the goddamn Batman’s next flick. Anne Hathaway? Eh. Blake Lively? Meh. Keira Knightley? Fuck now. Hit the comments box with your own feelings. Get inside yourself, and fondle around for a reaction.

[images & words is the comic book pick-of-the-week at OL. equal parts review and diatribe, the post highlights the most memorable/infuriating/entertaining book released that wednesday]

Just look at the title of this comic book – COWBOY NINJA VIKING.

Now try to convince me that you’re not interested. What’s that, you say it’s impossible? That’s right. Cowboys, ninjas, and vikings are all bad-ass in their own right and an unholy alliance of the three is nearly flabbergasting. In fact, I’m pretty sure that combining such potent staples of fiction is still illegal in the more fearful states of our union.

But I’m a bit of a narrative daredevil. As such, I look forward to partying with the COWBOY NINJA VIKING.

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Slashfilm has posted a shit load of pictures from the upcoming Captain America movie. These latest puppies showcase Hydra tanks from the battle of Something Something Top Secret during the second World War. Get ready comic book geeks! I instruct you to do your job and inspect these pictures. Comb the tanks for inaccuracies, and then post about them at Ain’t It Cool! It’s your duty. But you already knew that, you assholes.

Hit the jump for the pictures.

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Listen, purveyors of cool. If you’re not watching The Walking Dead, you’re fucking up. Done fucking up well. The first two episodes have been ass-clenching awesome. The good news for those of us who are watching it? Well, not only have we made it the best debut for a show ever on AMC, but we’ve earned ourselves a reward.

The show has been picked up for a full second season.

AMC via Slashfilm:

(New York, NY — November 8, 2010) AMC announced today the renewal of “The Walking Dead” for a 13-episode second season. Since debuting Sunday, October 31, “The Walking Dead” has broken ratings records, with the series reaching more Adults 18-49 than any other show in the history of cable television.

“I wish all programming decisions were no brainers like this one,” said Sharon Tal Yguado, SVP Scripted Programming. “‘The Walking Dead’ is a TV masterpiece on so many levels. We want at least 10 seasons, if not more. Kudos to AMC!”

AMC’s “The Walking Dead” is based on the comic book series written by Robert Kirkman and published by Image Comics.   Kirkman serves as an executive producer on the project and three-time Academy Award-nominee Frank Darabont (The Shawshank Redemption, The Green Mile) serves as writer, director and executive producer. Gale Anne Hurd (The Terminator, Aliens, Armageddon, The Incredible Hulk), chairman of Valhalla Motion Pictures, serves as Executive Producer. David Alpert from Circle of Confusion and Charles “Chic” Eglee (Dexter, The Shield, Dark Angel) serve as Executive Producers.

Fucking awesome. The best part is that it’s an entire season. Right now, this little ditty we’re being treated to is a six-episode cock tease. Good lord, it’s going to be over before we know it. At least we have something to look forward to! Right on.

[Chris Samnee via Comic Twart]

Chris Samnee, artist on the joyride Thor: The Mighty Avenger, is one of my current favorites. So it makes sense that his minimalist take of his on the JLA gives me a fanboy boner alert. Head over to Comic Twart for more minimalist renditions of your favorite collection of capes and cowls by some rather talented folk.

Oh good! I’ve been eagerly anticipating who is going to play the preachy annoying ass old Uncle and the fucking useless save for emo-kid pep talks Aunt in the Spider-Man reboot being directed by Marc Webb. Well, now I have to wait no longer! Apparently both roles have been cast.

io9:

Martin Sheen, who I would certainly consider one of Hollywood’s most avuncular actors, has reportedly been cast as the new Uncle Ben in Marc Webb’s reboot. It’s unclear whether he will appear in the main narrative, which would suggest the story is retelling Spider-Man’s origins from the beginning, or whether he will (probably more likely) just appear in flashbacks. Either way, this fits well with earlier reports that the filmmakers were casting a child Peter Parker, which definitely would involve scenes when Uncle Ben was alive. Also, another report says Sally Field is in talks to play Aunt May.

Thoughts? I don’t really care either way. Casting that neither offends, nor amazes.

And on a final note, may I just say fuck Uncle Ben. Dude is always preaching about responsibility and shit, but he didn’t even take out a life insurance policy on himself. Then his dumb ass gets shot because he won’t give up his rickety piece of shit car, and leaves his disgustingly old wife behind to tend to his socially retarded but brilliant nephew. He needs to get off his soap box, but that’s just my opinion.

[images & words is the comic book pick-of-the-week at OL. equal parts review and diatribe, the post highlights the most memorable/infuriating/entertaining book released that wednesday]

Nuclear threats. Satanic rituals. Daddy issues. Drug binges. Time travel. Ass-kickings.

No, I’m not calculating the formula for a Megadeth record, I’m listing some of the shenanigans that appear in Batman and Robin #16. Grant Morrison concludes his duties on the title by bringing Bruce Wayne back from the dead (or temporal instability, but same difference) and making unprecedented changes to the Bat-mythos. It’s fuggin’ wonderful.

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