#September2011
Nirvana for Nerds – Con 101
[Caffeine Note: Friend of the Brothers Omega Budrickton is a scholar, gentleman, and frequenter of conventions. He wanted a venue to share his thoughts and but of course we obliged. Hug him and give him a mug of your freshest mead.]
The young nerd’s life is often an unforgiving enterprise. Their trading-card-trading, Pokémon-playing, perpetually chunky and uncoordinated elementary years are just the beginning of a number of roads, many of which run off the edge of a cliff, socially speaking.
These rocky starts for my brethren are usually followed up with a high school life of true class; basement-dwelling, Han-shot-first, ‘virgin-forever’ years function as a training ground for learning how to work an innate and exuberant nerdiness into daily life, and possibly, actually interact with ordinary people!
There’s hope in these years; nerds either abandon their ways in pursuit of socializing, underage drinking, and the holy grail: losing your virginity before age 18. Or, they go full throttle, and become what they were always destined to be at the place where all nerds unite:
The Con.
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Video: Time-Lapse of the Space Station Flying Over Earth. Space-Porno.
This video is pure space porn. Time-lapse video of the International Space Station bombing over the surface of the Earth.
Hit the jump.
Ultimate Comics Spider-Man #1: Make Mine Miles Morales.
You know the story. Marvel killed off Peter Parker, and replaced him with a half-Latino, half-Black character named Miles Morales. Divisive as fuck. Forced some claim, excellent others exclaim. This week the first issue dropped with him in it, and the question quickly shifted to: is this fucking comic good?
The answer for me? Absolutely.
DEFEAT. 045 – after words.
[DEFEAT. is a coming-of-death novella. Brian Galiano lends his artistic talents to each episode. this is the post-coital cigarette.]
Rimina Jacoby sat in Bandini’s Café, leisurely smoking a cigarette and drinking coffee. Black. Bandini himself had tried to persuade her to try the espresso but she said she’d seen what it was capable of. And frankly, she laughed, she didn’t think it would be quite strong enough for her taste.
With her gray sleeves rolled up to her elbows, Rimina handled a newspaper. Her eye searched the front page, settling on the date. “Yes, yes, yes…that is when today happened.
The little bell above the door jingled. The Woman in Gray Robes didn’t look up to see who was entering. She already knew. She had planned on meeting him here, at this moment. In fact, years later she would tell him to make sure he was there so that they could palaver. As equals.
Or as close to equals as they would ever be.
Face of a Franchise: Daredevil
[face of a franchise presents two individuals that’ve fulfilled the same role. your task — choose the better of the two and defend your choice in the rancor pit that is the comments section]
Since his debut in 1964, comics fans (especially those that love to exclaim Make mine Marvel, muthafuckah!!!) have been wowie-zowied by the antics of Daredevi, the man without fear! Despite hitting the scene in a costume ridiculous even by comics standards, Daredevil won over fans by beating all sorts of criminal ass at night while maintaining a successful law practice during the day as Matt Murdock.
Pretty, pretty, pretty, pretty good.
Also, the guy’s blind. Which makes his feats even more spectacular. I mean, Ray Charles was cool as hell, but I don’t think he’d handle a trampoline half as well as Murdock.
Also tack on the fact that bad-ass writers seem to gravitate towards Daredevil (historically – Frank Miller/recently – Ed Brubaker), and it’s clear why the character is afforded such genuine respect. The mouthbreathin’, anti-social panel-worshippers that I count myself amongst fucking love Daredevil.
Fortunately, the admiration for this Marvel Knight has been truly honored by the two men fearless enough to portray him in live-action.
If for no other reason, 1989 was a wonderful year because it saw the release of The Trial of the Incredible Hulk, a made-for-TV movie continuing the adventure that began in The Incredible Hulk series. Of course, any time that a Marvel character goes on trial, there’s only one man to turn to for help: Attorney Matt Murdock! The hero of Hell’s Kitchen was portrayed by Rex Smith, the only man brave enough to ride the Street Hawk! Although relegated to a supporting role, Smith’s interpretation of Daredevil as a ninjutsu-lookin’ legally-blind lawyer that helps a green gargantuan is simply chilling.
Whereas Rex Smith’s Daredevil is a one-round knockout, Ben Affleck’s portrayal is a twelve-round slugfest. After blowing away audiences with Reindeer Games, Affleck was given his second once-in-a-lifetime role in 2003’s Daredevil. In this dark vision of the Daredevil mythos, Matt Murdock not only has to fight Bullseye, but the entire Green Mile as well! Proving himself to be a world-class thespian, Affleck navigated his way through playground battles with Elektra, Irish guys with facial scars, and a soundtrack that includes both Nickelback and Hoobastank.
A miracle performance. Nothing less.
So who do you think is the superior Daredevil? The dude from the TV-movie that no one remembers or the dude from the movie no one likes?
Rex Smith or Ben Affleck?
Two Dudes Reenact ‘Weekend At Bernie’s’ In Real Life. Tremendous.
Two dudes in Denver found their friend dead in his apartment. They decided to kick it like Bernie’s, bringing him around to strip clubs and bars and the such.
Asteroid ‘Vesta’ Has Itself A Lumpy Ass. Space Shame.
(Click to enlarge. Via: Vesta’s odd bottom)
Vesta is an asteroid 300 miles wide. According to Phil Plait, that means the son of a gun should be crushed into sphere. Yet, it isn’t.
Why is that?
Infographic: Behold All The Star Wars Changes In Chronological Order.
Did you think Lucas started smashing the original trilogy into bits starting back with the Special Editions in 1997? You’d be wrong. I knew he had tinkered before, but I never realized the shit began back the year of its actual release.
Hit the jump to check out all the changes.
GTA IV Has Shipped 22 Million Copies, Franchise Stands At 114 Million. Lots of Ducets.
Grand Theft Auto sells. It sells really fucking well. While I wasn’t blown away by the fourth installment, I enjoyed it enough to understand why it’s such a plastic disc-pusher. Take-Two CEO Strauss Zelnick recently announced the son of a bitch has shipped 22 million copies. 22 million.
Cat Scan Reveals 72 Cocaine Capsules In One Stomach. Drug Trafficking Is X-Treme.
Drug trafficking is fucking hardcore. Have you ever wondered what it looks like to stuff 72 cocaine capsules into your stomach and hope for the best? Yeah, me neither. But I have seen it now, and it’s fucking ludicrous.
