Dumb Speculation: Russo Brothers sign Sony deal; mayhaps rebooting ‘Spider-Man’

The Russo Brothers.

Maybe it ain’t Drew Goddard rebooting Spider-Man? Maybe it’s the Russo Brothers. Men behind Cap 2 and Cap: Civil War. You know, the movie everyone is sweating Spider-Man to appear in. Now they’ve signed a deal with Sony, home of The Spider-Men. Could these be the dudes to reboot Spidey?

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NEW Spider-Man Set Photos Got Parker In A Pimp Robe. Rock.

I often get into a debate about what I give a fuck about and what I’ll post about. Generally I ignore shit I don’t give a fuck about, but sometimes there’s a subsection of something I give a fuck about that I actually don’t give a fuck about.

Translation: I’m riding the new Spider-Man’s jock, but I don’t give a fuck about retarded set photos taken while they’re not shooting. But for continuity’s sake, I’ll post them anyways.


Hit the jump for the junk.

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Spider-Man Reboot Gets An Official Title! Plus, New Promo Image.

Oh snap, the Spider-Man reboot has gotten its official title. Hold your breath! Ready? It’s going to be called The Amazing Spider-Man. Shocking? Sort of? Maybe? No? Predictable? None of those responses would surprise me.

It’s amazing that with all the Parker rage going on here at OL from myself and others, I’m eagerly anticipating the flick. I dug Webb’s 500 Days, and Garfield’s performance in the Social Network sold me as well. I’m certain that whatever apathy I have regarding the franchise as a whole won’t prohibit me from giving the reboot a fair chance.

Hit the jump for the promo image they dropped at the time of the announcement.

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New Spider-Man Movie Brings Back Web-Shooters! OMFG, Dorks.

Hey dickhead dorks. Yeah, you. The ones that gripe. You can scratch something off your list of Infinitely Long Things to Bitch about. The new Spider-Man flick by Marc Webb starring Andrew Garfield is bringing back web-shooters. Praise Allah! Right? The confirmation comes from Emma Stone dropping an interview with MTV. Hit the jump for the details.

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Andrew Garfield Talks About The Beginning Of Spider-Man Filming.

Earlier this week we got our first glimpse of Andrew Garfield as Spider-Man. Now today running throughout the various pipes and tubings of the internet are excerpts from The Los Angeles Times‘ interview with him. Taken from The Envelope, the awards blog for the Times, Garfield opens up about the first two weeks of filming the new Spider-Man flick.

Hit the jump for excerpts, and an insight into the new Peter Parker. Hint: he seems less doughy and dorky than Tobey McGuire. I like.

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New Spider-Man Movie To Spider-Crap On Mythos?

Completely sensationalist title! Ha! I got you! And I just stole your cookie, what the fuck are you going to do? But no seriously. Apparently Emma Stone was on Jay Leno last night, and she dropped the claim that she’s going to be around for a few web-slinging flicks. When Jay asked how long she’ll be keeping her blond hair, she responded “There’s a few Spidermen, so I may have to keep it for a couple of years.”


Every Spider-Man dude knows that Gwen bites the fucking bullet hard. It’s one of the multitude of reasons that Parker is a whiny bitch. But! Could they be changing something? Is Gwen going to live? Sure, her surviving one film doesn’t mean she isn’t going to die eventually. However, let’s dare to dream. I’d be very excited if they decided to keep Gwen as Parker’s main squeeze.

Not only have we done the whole courting of Mary Jane, but I’m going to hit you guys with something: I fucking hate Mary Jane. Yeah, I know she symbolizes the impossibility that the average nerd can’t attain. What is more of an accomplishment than the dweeb acquiring the supermodel who gets him?

Not much.

But I’ve always preferred Stacy to MJ, and if this means she’ll be keeping a pulse for the foreseeable future, then good.

First Look At Emma Stone As Gwen Stacy


..Sort of? Psyche! Total tabloid title there. But yeah, this is a look at Emma Stone with blond hair. Stone, a natural blond is known for rocking a firey mane. But with Stacy being an Aryan posterchild, she took it back to her roots. Literally! LOL, I’m a comedian. Puns ahoy!

But seriously, she looks fucking gorgeous. And very Gwen Stacy. I’m sold, super sold. I was sold before, and now I’m doubling-down. A double order of yes.

Hit the jump for more pictures of her loving ridiculously Gwen Stacy-esque.

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Denis Leary Cast In The New Spider-Man Movie, Keep Lenny Clarke Away.

Denis Leary is swinging onto the set of the new Spider-Man movie. Puns, ahoy! Leary will be playing George Stacy, father of the inestimably superior Parker love interest, Gwen. Well, until she all gets her neck broken and shit. It’s casting that I wouldn’t have seen coming, but to be truthful, I wasn’t even contemplating Gwen’s family or the necessity of casting them.

I’m cool with it, as long as it doesn’t result in Lenny Clarke getting cast as anything but a corpse in the flick. Leary’s friend seems to be his sidekick, and seems to find his way into things the former is cast in. The problem? He is the anti-funny, eliminating funny within a thirty foot radius of anything he does.

Thoughts on the casting?

Uncle Ben and Aunt May Cast In Spider-Man Reboot! Woo?

Oh good! I’ve been eagerly anticipating who is going to play the preachy annoying ass old Uncle and the fucking useless save for emo-kid pep talks Aunt in the Spider-Man reboot being directed by Marc Webb. Well, now I have to wait no longer! Apparently both roles have been cast.


Martin Sheen, who I would certainly consider one of Hollywood’s most avuncular actors, has reportedly been cast as the new Uncle Ben in Marc Webb’s reboot. It’s unclear whether he will appear in the main narrative, which would suggest the story is retelling Spider-Man’s origins from the beginning, or whether he will (probably more likely) just appear in flashbacks. Either way, this fits well with earlier reports that the filmmakers were casting a child Peter Parker, which definitely would involve scenes when Uncle Ben was alive. Also, another report says Sally Field is in talks to play Aunt May.

Thoughts? I don’t really care either way. Casting that neither offends, nor amazes.

And on a final note, may I just say fuck Uncle Ben. Dude is always preaching about responsibility and shit, but he didn’t even take out a life insurance policy on himself. Then his dumb ass gets shot because he won’t give up his rickety piece of shit car, and leaves his disgustingly old wife behind to tend to his socially retarded but brilliant nephew. He needs to get off his soap box, but that’s just my opinion.