#October2014

Space Porn: The Milky Way as viewed from the International Space Station

Swoon!

I say goddamn! If we can’t get up into them there Inter-national Space-Stations, at least they are doing us some solids. Sending back gorgeous pictures like this one. The Milky Way Galaxy straight bulgin’, the cosmos waving hello.

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NASA’s new Mars-Orbiter, MAVEN, is officially in orbit

MAVEN

Around the Red Planet, the secret Steve Jobs and Richard Nixon-led Illuminati are scrambling. Trying to cover up their Pyramids and Installations with optical camouflage. You see those pesky NASA folks have gotten themselves a new Mars-Orbiter set to gather data on Ares. This is dope for us. Not so much for the Illuminati.

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SPACE GET! – SpaceX and Boeing are now NASA’s space taxis to the ISS

ISS

Fuck to the yes! NASA has announced that human spaceflight is once again going to be rocking and rolling out of the United States. To the skies! To the rocks! To the stars! Once more. With some help from some friends. And the non-mysterious benefactors that will be aiding them courtesy of fuckin’ lucrative contracts are SpaceX and Boeing.

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Science-Wizards find water clouds outside the solar system for first time

Behold!

Chalk this up as one of the many, many things I did not know about in this Universe. Apparently water clouds are rare as fuck on planets.  Even within our solar system. But Astronomer-Shaman have found some outside the solar system. For the first time!

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This image of the Lagoon Nebula is a whirlwind of glory

goddamn lagoon nebula!

Behold! The goddamn Lagoon Nebula! Okay, okay. It’s behind the cut. But whatever. It’s here, lurking. And would you know, that Nebula ain’t fucking around. At the center of it are two goddamn funnel clouds, each half a light-year long. Which is impressive to me, but probably not to the Universe. ‘Cause the Universe is big. #PostPadding #Obviousness

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NASA intends to make oxygen from CO2 on Mars’ surface

Mars. Let's get the fuck there. Now.

Science-science-science-fiction up in this real (real?) world! NASA is strapping a fucking shitload of stuff onto their Mars 2020 rover. And one of them gadgets is MOXIE — a sumbitch’ that is intended to make oxygen from the CO2 is finds on the surface. Boom! Pow! Reality!

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This is the first image of the Moon by a U.S. spacecraft. Neato.

it's the goddamn moon!

This is the “first picture taken of the moon” by U.S. spacecraft. “First.” If you believe that, I got a fucking bridge to sell you. I have it on good authority that the U.S. has had a base on the Dark Side of the Moon since Teddy Roosevelt’s first administration. Studying the Martians. Preparing. Always preparing.

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NASA: Testing laser-powered drill to explore Jupiter’s moon, Europa

Europa, wut wut

How the fuck we going to explore Jupiter’s moon, Europa? Eh! It’s iced out as fuck! NASA got itself an idea of how to go about doing it, and it’s begun testing this idea. A fucking laser-powered drill.

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SPECULATION: One of Pluto’s Moons (Charon) could have water

Pluto + Charon.

Hey man, in a world where our empirical data is constantly challenged, isn’t like *bong rip* everything just speculation, mannn? But yeah. NASA Astronomer Wizards are wondering if there is water on one of Pluto’s moons. Which would be neat. It’d be one more resource the slap-ass dummies who run the world couldn’t get together to harvest. Ah man *bong rip* I gotta keep that PMA.

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Wut: Massive “OCEAN” discovered towards Earth’s core.

THE PLANET CORE

Somewhat fittingly, Bateman and I were recently discussing how the Earth was first populated with water. In a state of inebriation, and probable complete incorrectness, I recalled a theory that the Earth was continuously pelted with comets from the Oort Cloud Kupier Belt. Even if I was recounting the theory correctly (and I’m sure I probably wasn’t), a new challenger to that probably-wrong theory has entered the arena!

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