#May2014

Cosplay: FEMALE GREEN LANTERN lights up my day. PUNZPUNZ

Green Lantern!

ALL THE SHITTY PUNZ!!! Seriously though, this is some wonderful Green Lantern cosplay. Especially given, you know, my *ahem* bodysuit fetish.

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THE ROCK further teases he’ll play GREEN LANTERN

The Rock.

What is in a hashtag, bros? Brodettes? I ask you. ‘Cause either The Rock is rubbing us gently against the tip of his Green Lantern, or he is trolling the living shit out of us. In an Instagram picture filled with many other words, the hashtag at the end was worth like, a zillion more. Huh?

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‘BLADE RUNNER’ SEQUEL gets ‘GREEN LANTERN’ writer. YOU REPLICAN’T BE F**KING SERIOUS.

Blade Runner.

If the shit show that was Prometheus didn’t talk you out of believing that the sequel to Blade Runner would be good, take a fat hit of this to your dome. The fucking writer for the bloody diarrhea monster that was Green Lantern has been brought aboard the project.

Abandon hope, all ye.

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‘JUSTICE LEAGUE’ MOVIE will have five core characters, no dance scenes. WTF.

Just two dudes, talking it out.

Okay, okay. They never said there were going to be any dance scenes in the Justice League movie. Instead, it has been a silent hope of mine. What better way to solidify the tension between Wayne and Clark, than by them finally slinging dongs on the dance floor while talking out their differences? It’s a minor loss for the film, but a loss none the less.

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‘EARTH 2′ WRITER James Robinson: Alan Scott Won’t Be The Only Gay Character In Earth 2. I’d Hope Not.

Alan Scott is the prominent character that DC is introducing into New 52 continuity as gay. The original Green Lantern! Neat? It all sort of feels like a cop out to me, plastering this announcement everywhere and then finding out its a dude 70% of pop culture doesn’t know. Writer of Earth 2  James Robinson was discussing all of this with The Advocate  when he revealed the obvious (?), that Alan Scott won’t be the only gay character.

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DC’s “Prominent Gay Character” Is Going To Be Alan Scott. Well There’s That.

DC’s “prominent character” that is going to be reintroduced into the New 52 as gay turns out to be Alan Scott, the original Green Lantern.

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Video: Nathan Fillion and Tim Daly Get A Bit Too Into Their Voice Acting

Listen. Sometimes it gets a smidge difficult to differentiate reality from fantasy. Especially living in the Muiltiverse, where the first logical thing to think whenever anything gets weird is “Well, I’ve slide into an alternate dimension where these Goblin Men with soft serve ice cream coming out of their nipples must be the norm” , right? So I don’t blame  Nathan Fillion and Tim Daly for having a bit of difficulty disconnecting from their roles as Green Lantern and Superman.

Hit the jump to watch the humorous struggle.

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Video: The Green Lantern/Robot Chicken Special Will Smoke The Reynolds Atrocity.

Check out a preview of the Robot Chicken/Green Lantern collaboration. It doesn’t seem to make much sense, then you watch it and you’re like…oh this is going to be good. Dang good. I mean, a Green Lantern cock  ring? Sold.

Hit the jump to check it out.

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‘Green Lantern’ Sequel To Be Edgier, Darker. Can It Also Exist…Less?

I should have known that Green Lantern would make enough money to get a sequel. The movie was raw ass. Not offensive, maddening, sickening bullshit like Transformers 3. Rather it was unforgettable. A flaccid romp through a CGI nightmare. Fuck that movie, and fuck that it is getting a sequel.

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Green Lantern: Brown Bag of Dog Crap.

I saw Green Lantern last night. It’s a bad movie. Like, real bad. I hold the unfortunate culpability of dragging along my girlfriend and another couple to the theater, and costing them hard earned bucks. Despite what you may think, I at even mid-week I still held out hope that this movie would be passable. To the point of inviting other people alone. By Friday afternoon I knew that I was in fact an asshole. By Friday evening after the movie I felt a certain sense of guilty.

This movie fucking stunk. This shit stank with the power of a thousand dog craps baked in the muggy Boston air.

For those of you who intelligently pointed out a while ago that it was going to suck, I tip my cap. Should have listened.

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