Really? Retitling Avengers: Infinity War’s two parts? Like — they’re pretty straight forward, and sensible. However, the Russo Brothers say the titles are temporary. But hey, I guess it makes sense, if they’re actually different-enough movies. At the same time, though. They’re certainly better than Rogue One: A Star Wars Story: Anthology Tales Time or whatever Lucasfilm is titling their side flicks.
Shh. Can you hear that? It’s subsonic vibrations vomiting down the Omnipresent Now, hinting at the reality that fucking Edgar Wright is doing an Ant-Man movie. In case you forgot. ‘Cause it’s easy to let things slip out of our meat-skulls with the relentless pop culture news cycle. But word, Ant-Man is coming folks, and here is how the movie that ain’t arrived yet influenced The Avengers.
It’s with a tearful eye and a hyper-extended thumbs-up that I bid farewell to 2012.
The last twelve months have been some of the finest of my entire life. And I’m not exaggerating. Unlike those saccharine slobs who always clamor about the present hour being their finest and the preceding moments nothing more than the bliss-steps to their existence plateaus, I have no illusions about the fact that I’ve chalked up some miserable years. I’ve anguished through entire calendars, burnin’ `em up with fuel of the most incendiary sort.
Self-doubt! Resentment! Apathy! Vitriol! Cynicism! Sally forth towards the mire!
But 2012 was a whole different beast. Sure, there definitely some moments when my nostrils were assailed by the wispy vapors of the aforementioned propellants. But repugnance was ultimately cast aside, overpowered by the surfeit of wonder! It’s almost as though entertainment and art and love formed a giant sword-wieldin’, monster-destroyin’ mech, and I got to pilot the son-of-a-bitch!
Anyways, it looks as though every crew member of Spaceship OL is delivering their year-end highlights, so I’m going to join the party. But since I’ve garnered a reputation as being the erratic, currently-undiagnosed-but-we’re-working-on-it, hack-writin’ resident of the crew, I’m going to switch things up a bit. Each of my highlights will be paired with an Ultra-Dimensional Portal! By clicking on any UDP, a hole will be punched in space-time, and your consciousness will be projected astrally.
Got it? Okay, here’s one last look at 2012!
This is some outrageously fantastically swell endeavoring, right here. Artist Butcher Billy has taken old school Marvel artwork and interjected it into movies from the House of Ideas. The results are disjointed bliss.
Pencil this in as “fucking obvious”, friends. It is rumored that Darkseid is going to be the villain in the upcoming Justice League movie. It’s going to be great when people get Darkseid and Thanos confused, and/or begin to bicker over who is the less lame purple piece of shit big bad.
Man. Grab me a tissue. Or two. This deleted alternate introduction for Steve Rogers gets the waterworks going in my flabby, easily-moved corpus.
In an effort to promote The Avengers Blu-Ray release by giving away for free everything that would make us want it, Marvel has dropped a alternate opening to the flick. Regardless of whether or not it is well done, it certainly butts heads with the tone of the rest of the flick.
When Agent Coulson bought the farm in Avengers, there was a strong contingent rubbing themselves at the idea of him becoming the Vision. Whether or not he dons the digital life, one talented sculptor has given him the treatment.
I still ain’t over Avengers. I’ve seen it four times, but this has nary an effect on my voracious appetite for more. I will have to sate myself on adorable pop culture particles that the film has generated, such as these Avengers papercraft products.
Marvel, and Disney aren’t taking their Avengers success sitting down. Even though the flick is still demolishing box office records, deets regarding the eventual DVD and Blu-Ray disc have come out, giving its finger to all our fanboy and fangirl wallets.