Necessity is the mother of invention, folks. So when you need to transport pounds upon pounds of weed, you’re going to need to come up with something. This dude stuffed a Pac-Man arcade machine with the stickiest of ickies before he was busted. Even though he was caught, I still commend the fuck out of him.

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Welcome to Press Start! It’s a column about my intense self-loathing, eating and masturbatory habits, cleverly disguised as a week in the events of video game culture. Come on in.

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Check out this gorgeous nightmare by Peter Faylor. I saw the son of a bitch on my News Feed and I knew I need to share it with you. Let it ingest your deeper brain structures. Give in.

I knew yesterday felt special. Normally whenever there’s holiday, my taint grease gets a bit thicker. It’s the excitement. I just couldn’t figure out why  yesterday felt special, why  the grease was congealing so quickly. Now I do! Fucking Pac-Man Wow Day!

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I’m not going to play  Street Fighter X Tekken, but if I would I’d be totally rocking out as horrible US Box Art version of Mega Man. There’s Pac-Man too, and good lord if that isn’t chock full of win.

Hit the jump for details and the intro video.

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There’s a Pac-Man reality TV show in the works. This future-abortion is being helmed by Merv Griffin Entertainment, the fuckers behind Wheel of Fortune and Jeopardy!  I know it doesn’t make any sense, but welcome to the Wasteland, where nothing makes sense. Therefore, everything makes sense. We’re turning the board game Battleship into a fucking movie. Why can’t we turn Pac-Man into a reality show? Of course you don’t have a good reason! Here, have some details down your willing gullet, from  Roy Bank, the Guy Of Some Importance Or Something from Merv:

A big, crazy  Wipeout-type event with a lot of energy. The idea we have is to take what Pac-Man is and bring it to life, to bring what is essentially the world’s biggest game of tag to television.

I can’t imagine why this wouldn’t be a success and why we won’t all be stapled to our chairs while its on. Nonetheless, it isn’t the Pac-Man television show I envisioned. In my reality TV show, someone hides a bottle of Ambien in a giant grass  labyrinth. While I’m searching for it, people chase me with blunt objects. If I find the bottle of Ambien, I then pound them pills and chase them, because next to the bottle of Ambien is also a corked bat and an unloaded gun.

I think this would make for much more riveting television, but what the fuck do I know.

Source: Kotaku.