#August2015

Tom Hardy producing and starring in adaptation of comic ‘100 Bullets’

tom hardy!

Well, ain’t this an interesting development. I really, really fucking enjoyed 100 Bullets back in the day. And now Tom Hardy is producing and starring in an adaptation of the Azzarello/Risso jam. The comic is certainly raw as fuck, and if they swing a Hard-R I’m down for the whole shebang.

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‘The Dark Knight III: The Master Race’ getting artwork from Andy Kubert and Klaus Janson

MAZERT RA EE

I’m going to curiosity-read The Dark Knight III. But at least, no matter how terrible the story, it seems the artwork is going to be gnarly.

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DC confirms ‘The Dark Knight III: The Master Race’ for 2015

DKIII

Hey! The sequel to the sequel you didn’t want is coming! The uncomfortably named The Dark Knight III: The Master Race by Brian Azzarello and Frank Miller is dropping this year. And snark aside, fucking of course I’m curious to see what will be inside that shit.

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Buy These F**king Comics! – July 25, 2012: Zen and the Art of Underwater Welding

Welcome, welcome, welcome, to the funny book column at the end of the Internet. Or perhaps more specifically, at some abandoned asteroid-mining station spiraling into terminal descent. We here aboard the rickety ship don’t have much to comfort ourselves outside of the weekly comic book drop that comes courtesy of the spectra-gryphons sailing the solar waves. Drunk on cheap bathtub fermented moon juice and delusional from the vertigo, I admit my picks for worthwhile comic books can strike the bow a bit askew.

That’s where you come in, friends. Pull down the the blast shield long enough to bark out your finds in staccato bursts, before retiring to your dimly lit crevice in this here rotting rooster of a spaceship.

Don’t know what’s coming out? Pivot sharply and race down the cyber-wells towards the glowing info-cube. Comic List.

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Buy These F**king Comics! – April 25, 2012: Martian Babes and Dinosaur Hunting

Yeah, I’ve been toying with the name of this column for weeks now. I’ll just accept it. Ain’t no one home when it comes to this little installation on Spaceship Omega. Buy These Fucking Comics!, the column where we all share the funny books we’re buying this week. In theory. Most of the time it’s just me pissing into the wind, waiting for a friend. S’all good though. I like pee play, and like many things in life while it isn’t ideal to do it alone, it sure as shit beats not doing it at all.

Actually want to play the game? Hit up ComicList.

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Comics We’re Buying This Week: ‘ORC STAIN’ IS BACK, Stop F**king Everything!

Welcome to  Comics We’re Buying This Week.  At the end of a long fucking day, during a long fucking week in which I haven’t actually read  any comic books, I come to you.  My task!, should I choose to accept it: to tell you the funny books I’m buying during this ungodly weekly cycle. All I ask in return is that you partake in this community (I accidentally typed ‘cummunity’ so you can see the threads coming apart in here) by rattling off the swag you’re either buying or interested in that are dropping this week. It’s a simple conceit. Yet in these complicated times, isn’t that just a bit comforting? Make the nips soften a bit knowing every Wednesday lies some friends and some funnies.

Don’t know what’s coming out? Hit ComicList, then come back here. We’ll wait.

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Variant Covers: Wolverine’s Drunk And Beast Is Wearing A Red Wig

We’re shortly enclosing on the witching hour, the feast of October. The  ephemeral  time where the membrane between the expired and the wind-sucking melts before our eyes, unleashing torrents of evil and scares upon us. That ain’t the half of it either, dude. Motherfuckin’ candy up in the bitch and rotten teeth and syringes in the bags of your children. It’s dangerous out there! Stay inside. Read some funny books.

This is Variant Covers. The rags I’m stoked on this week. Share your pull-list after the spiel ends.

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Variant Covers: Thor and Odin Fight For The Hammer-Penis. The Conclusion!

While I’m writing this — assuredly not while you’re reading this — I’m sitting in a desolate café room on campus cranking out this column. Thinking of tomorrow, of comic books, of narrative-image fusion. Momentary escape. Fuck I love the funny books. I love sitting here, a momentary reprieve in a ten-hour day writing about them.

This is Variant Covers.

I’m Caffeine Powered.

These are the books I’m interested in this week.

—-
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David Goyer Is Bringing ‘100 Bullets’ To Showtime.

100 Bullets used to be a favorite comic series of mine. Then I fell out of the funny book swag for a good three or four years and when I returned I never caught up. Shame, damn shame. Even with this gulf between the series and myself, I’m pretty excited that it’s being adapted into a television show for Showtime.

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Jim Lee Returns To The God Damn Batman

Oh shit! Jim Lee is returning to Batman. Not to do something foolish like finishing off his run on All-Star Batman and Robin with Frank Miller, though its been rumored that he actually is going to complete that. Instead, the Dude Supreme of the 1990s is teaming up with Brian Azzarello for Batman: Europa.

The Source:

In the pages of BATMAN: EUROPA, the impossible has happened – the Batman is on the brink of defeat, at the hands of a virus with no cure. Surely there’s someone that can help him? Well, there is – the Joker. Who infected Batman with the virus? What does the Joker have to do to save him? And how can it all happen before the Dark Knight collapses? Together, the unlikely teammates and arch-foes travel through Europe cobbling together clues while the clock ticks down.

Well, alright then! I’m sold. I’m not a huge Jim Lee fan, but in a contradictory and ironic twist, his penciling something is enough to get me excited. Makes sense, right? Not at all? Oh, yeah, you’re probably correct. In a futile effort to defend my continual bipolarity, he’s such an icon that anything he drops is worth checking out. Especially considering that his work on Batman: Hush was friggin’ fantastic.