Hey, fuckers! Did you miss the stream on Saturday night? If so, what the fuck! But, we got you covered here. Jump into the first stream of the new year! We talking boners. We playing The Messenger. We spending too much time debating Black Mirror: Bandersnatch‘s merits, its medium, and other bullshit. Bags is housing tacos. Ian’s talking about taking his pants off. The fuck you waiting for? Let’s go!
I saw this really funny Onion article the other day. Its headline was something like, “Blogger apologies to fan base for not posting in a while.” You know, making fun of the self-importance dongs like me can feel. But, I promise you I don’t feel anything like that. However, I’m still not going to apologize to you fuckers. Instead, I’m just going to hit you with the first Desktop Thursday in like, a month! I hope your summer is going well. Mine has been fantastic. The precise sort of recuperative effort I needed, following a rather trying Spring semester. That said, it’s about to fucking end soon, and I don’t know how I’m going to handle it. Well, I hope! Fantastic, I plead!
Anyways, none the less. Check out some images from my life. Share your own in the comments.
The latest Twitch stream is up on YouTube. And oh boy, it’s a doozy. Bateman spends too much time ruminating on the, uh, uncomfortable fate of the slave kids in the Last Jedi.
We also really focus on the Cronenberg-esque body horror of Yoshi’s Island, which finds the reptile-alien-thing metamorphosing in truly horrid manners.
Finally, if that ain’t enough, we deep dive into the various characters we’ve met in a sauna at our gym. Uh, yup!
We’re celebrating Fourth of July weekend here in the Empire. That means the usual things, which have been enumerated some six or seven times here aboard the Space-Ship. Hormone-soaked beef. Testosterone-fueled chants of questionable supremacy. And other cynical shit. But it also means a great reason to gather ’round with your loved ones, throw back a few Adult Sodas, smoke some Shire Green, and have a good time. Not just your tangi-friends, either! But us, too. You know! Your favorite Monsters at the End of the Internet. So join us! At the Weekend Open Bar.
True story: last night the Wife and I went out to eat with an former professor of ours. I had two beers. Was completely rocked because I never drink. Got home. Ate three bagels while lå down on the coach and watching NHL Tonight. And then fell asleep. Which is to say, that’s why I haven’t opened the fucking bar yet! But here it is! Weekend Open Bar. The gathering point for the Degenerates that roam the halls of the Space-Ship Omega. Come one, come all! Hang out. Share what you’re up to this weekend. Ridicule me for being a lightweight when it comes to adult sodas! Commiserate with me about the fact that there is eighty-five hours of snowfall hitting New England.
Here’s part two of the fucking insanity that was recorded over Columbus Day Weekend. This pig-fucking rot-fest is filled with pseudo-intellectualism, superhero talk, Bateman body slamming a pizza delivery guy while we’re recording, and thirteen undergrad communication majors feeding us Skittles for internship credits. It’s pretty mundane, per usual. We also discuss my (temporary) departure from Facebook, Avengers 2: Tony Boner Time, and more.