ISS ASTRONAUTS to be kept company by doll-like humanoid. This will end in tears.
In my mind, this story can only end in one of two ways. Either this little robot becomes sentient, and slaughters everyone in the ISS. Or someone falls in love with it, filling its nooks and crannies with their biological data. I can’t be the only one who feels this way, right?
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Monday Morning Commute: Cough Medicine Suicide!
Welcome back, friends. The Starship Omega plummeting through the Cosmos has returned, swerving out of the way of an errant cosmic calamity. We’ve finally regained cruising altitude, and a flesh-bot of your desired gender/gender combination will be along to massage your pinkish naughties soon. My name is Caffeine Powered, and I’m the Custodian and Lead Seminal Slinger aboard this Galaxy Cruise. Right here about this time, as I am ripped to the gills on a cheap Theraflu knockoff and fighting a lengthy head cold, I’m going to pontificate on what I’m enjoying this week. And so are you! That’s the whole gimmick behind this nonsense, Monday Morning Commute. More Theraflu!
New Star Trek Into Darkness Trailer Teases Fans Some More
Just about a week ago, we got the first real look at the new Star Trek joint. As per usual, everyone on these internets went crazy for the fresh glimpse at the JJ Abrams’ film, dissecting and analyzing and investigating and doing any other word that means looking really deeply into everything about it. Understandably, of course. It’s pretty exciting stuff. And the teaser that dropped today is no different. Check it out after the jump.
Buy These F**king Comics! – Dec 12, 2012: Fetish Objects, Fanboys, and Glazed Thighs
Welcome to Buy These F**king Comics!, the weekly column where we share the various sequential treats we’re gobbling up off the shelves. The wonder of this column is audience participation. No shirts, no shoes required! Just sit there in your dingy underwear, your sweat, and seminal soaked (oh man am I typecasting our lot or what?) t-shirts and recommend a slurry of titles for me to check out. Don’t know what being snapped into brown plastic bags this week? Hit up Comic List.
Woman uses her breasts to smuggle cocaine. Enterprising ++
If I have learned anything from Breaking Bad, it is that drug smuggling is the mother of invention. While not nearly as cool as using an entire chicken restaurant to smuggle drugs, this enterprising lass used something quite interesting. Her bub-bub cavities.
‘PACIFIC RIM’ TRAILER: The Apocalypse is a Fanboy Orgasm.
The veil has finally been pulled back on Guillermo del Toro’s robot and monsters flick, Pacific Rim. And what lurks behind said veil is a collection of fanboy tropes set to push the good lot of us into the throes of back-arching bliss. Giant robots, more gianter (shh) monsters, karate, epic speeches. It’s a collection of everything that used to grease my groin back in my more formative years. My body is ready.
‘BIOSHOCK INFINITE’ is getting a B-Side cover, and we decide.
Ken Levine was pretty forthright in his explanation of why BioShock Infinite‘s cover was straight dude-rock. To make the title seem appealing to those who hadn’t heard of it. It’s a fucking industry, people! In an effort to combat the less than tasty cover, Irrational Games is offering a chance to vote on the flip-side cover. Pretty solid move, in my honest humble truthful wonderful blessed opinion.
Christopher Nolan plays it cool about BATMAN cameo in ‘MAN OF STEEL.” Oh, Chrissy.
Want to know if that rumor about the Batman cameo in Man of Steel is legit? Chrissy Nolan ain’t telling you, so just shut up! The director was recently asked about the juicy little nougat of potential, and played coy like a motherfucker.
The Dude’s High 5s: Christmas Movies
If you’re an avid reader of my High 5s, and let’s face it, who isn’t, you’ll know I don’t like Christmas. People are angry. They are stressed out. They spend far too much money on gifts and over extend themselves. Its painful to watch. Now, that’s not to say I want to eradicate the holiday. I enjoyed the hell out of it when I was a kid, but now that I’m older I can see behind the curtain. Around this time TV stations start running the same holiday movies over and over and over and over. If I actually watched TV anymore it would be nerve racking. So here we go, my 5 favorite Christmas movies.
‘OBLIVION TRAILER: Tom Cruise, science fiction, and maybe even a plot.
I wasn’t going to check out the trailer for Oblivion, but our own Eddie Not A Planet told me it held gorgeous visuals deep, deep, deep within its guts. So I did! How about that shit? After viewing it, I got a bit of a science fiction chubby for it. I’ll cop to that, and fuck that is without any clue as to what the movie is about. If there was a discernible plot, I may even be tugging nuggets all over my keyboard to the trailer. Picture that!
