Square Enix: OH SH*T, People Like JRPGS. Us: Yeahnoduhbruh.
Don’t get excited! Don’t! But there are signs that Square Enix may actually be pulling their head out of their ass. It’s fucking up there, so it may take some time. Fecaltainment spraying everywhere. A frightening, rumbling sucking sound as their cranium emerges. But after the sales of Bravely Default, the company is all like: wait, people like JRPGs. No fucking shit. Now can we get a real Final Fantasy?
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Harry Potter spin-off ‘FANTASTIC BEASTS’ will be a movie trilogy
More news on that Harry Potter spin-off, Fantastic Beasts. Apparently it ain’t just going to be one movie. ‘Cause who the fuck does one movie anymore?! Losers. That’s who. It’s all about the trilogy. Truthfully, the odd, pseudo-meta premise of the book (inside a book? I think?) has me intrigued. So while I’m not particularly sure what the fuck it is all about, I’m willing to preemptively dig on it.
PHIL SPENCER (Blazer & T-Shirt Guy) is the new HEAD OF XBOX
Phil Spencer: Mostly known to me as the Blazer & T-Shirt Guy from his various presentations. Now I’m going to know the lad by another appellation: Head of XBOX. I don’t really know how to feel. Microsoft has spent the last year peeling off restrictions from their console, getting outsold by the PS4, and making me fucking pay for an adapter to use my existing headset. Is Spencer behind any of this? Will he alleviate some of this douchery now that he’s in control? I wonder. As an owner of the XBONER, I’m hoping he does a fantastic job.
Cosplay: ZELDA and SHEIK are two halves of the same awesome
OMFG, spoiler alert or something? Yeah whatever, up your game if that shit is ruining something for you. Anyhoo – now that I’m done berating the three people who actually read this site (by accident probably), here’s some dope cosplay.
Obvious ‘EPISODE VII’ casting news: The Furball Is Back
Like, did we not expect Chewbacca back in the Star Wars: Greatest Hits Edition fold? I mean, c’mon. However I do suppose that the news which pretty much confirms Peter Mayhew’s return is radical in another manner. That manner? That they’re using the original actor. Pretty swell. Remember the seventy shades of bullshit that struck when Lucas didn’t use Prowse for Episode III?
Watch: RYU vs JESSE from ‘BREAKING BAD’ = best fan video
This is fucking wonderful. I don’t got anything else to say. Save for “tip of the cap” to this video’s creator. He’s way more inspired and far superior to my wretched ass.
EA looking to ‘BATMAN: ARKHAM’ games as inspiration for ‘STAR WARS’ titles
I don’t often praise Electronic Arts, but Imma go ahead and do it here. Some Chief President Guy with a Fancy Title of EA was recently talking about how the company is going to handle the Star Wars franchise. And go fucking figure, the Dude references the Batman: Arkham games as a source of inspiration for the SW games. Fuck yeah.
Warner Bros. ALL FIXIN’ to announce NEW SERIES of DC-BASED flicks soon.
This makes sense, right? I mean, Warner Bros. has to like eventually announce their first full slate of movies. Good knows when though, since “soon”, could mean from next week all the way through SDCC.
Facebook building DRONES WITH LASERS to bring INTERNET to errbuddy.
Facebook. Conquering virtual reality. Conquering the Internet with drones. Pretty much just conquering. Your titty pics, and bro-abs are soon going to be soaring through the air courtesy of lasers. Drones. Making them almost seem not completely self-absorbed, banality-core. Right? They’ll just be owned, stapled to the guts of the Monolithic Facebook Intertwebs. (This story is actually about something different. A little. But indulge me.)
