The E3 2010 hype continues, this time in the form of a Fallout: New Vegas trailer with old-ass music, wastelands, and ridiculously gorgeous gameplay. I’m ready, ready like woah for this game. I’ve already begun building a replica bunker from which I shall play the game. I will only leave it every thirty-six hours to scowl at the sky, and feel sun accentuating the sores and gunk-filth coating my unwashed, withering body. Are you in on this commitment to the game with me? Hit the jump for the gorgeous trailer.

Keep Reading »

Yesterday, in the white-noise factory of whirling cooling systems, soccer moms with fupas and shitty super-processed hair styles. In the dome of monotony of shining packages with clamoring advertising lines. I scour the many sexy packages that call to me, my childish mentality consistently amused by their saccharin and bright plastic lights. Spying some tampons, I come across a brilliant, cost-cutting and effective idea in the rotting walls of my skull-mush.

Caffeine Powered: …If I was a girl, I think I’d use a shamwow for my periods. Just wring that shit out at the end of the night.

Lady Caffeine: Oh my god.

I’m not going to brag, but I think I’m on to something brilliant for these recession-laden times.

[via comics alliance: click images to enlarge]

I’m already pretty stoked for Matt Fraction and Pasqual Ferry to be taking over Thor this September. And now I’m geeking out Viking-stylee over the new mini-series Thor: For Asgard by Robert Rodi and Simone Bianchi also dropping in September. Why? Jesus Christ, look at Simone Bianchi’s pencils. They’re like getting eye-fucked and loving it. Thor’s hammer of justice is crushing you, and you’re going to love it.

Keep Reading »

With E3 around the corner, we got some new Dead Space 2 goodness up in here. How about some debut gameplay footage? Say wooooord! Fucking Issac Clarke is back, and he is ready to rock out in the best mash-up of Event Horizon, Alien, and Your Worst Nightmares. Again. The original Dead Space is one of my favorite games of the generation, and I have to cop and admit that this sequel has me flapping my hands up and down excitedly like that girl that used to wear the helmet on the bus.

Hit the jump for the fuggin’ gameplay trailer!

Keep Reading »

Ohhh fucking shit! I got midichlorians coming out of the fucking ass, and I’m ready to rock! A real life lightsaber? With the ability to blind and kill my friends in hot pursuit of amazing Darwin awards? Let’s fucking do this!

via gizmodo:

Built with the blue-laser diode of a dismantled Casio projector, the $200 Spyder III Pro Arctic is the world’s most powerful portable laser. It can permanently blind you and set your skin–or anything else, really–on fire almost instantly.

“With greater power comes the need for greater responsibility.” That’s actually what Wicked Lasers, the mad geniuses behind the Spyder III, wrote to us in an email describing this terrifying piece of technology. They wanted to make one thing very clear: this is not merely a laser pointer, and it’s certainly not a toy. What it is, really, is a weapon.

The diodes in Casio’s new mercury-free Green Slim projectors apparently allow for unprecedentedly powerful portable lasers, and Wicked Lasers has gleefully harvested them for the 1 Watt Spyder III. Comparing it to the $2000 Sonar, the company’s reigning portable laser powerhouse, Wicked Lasers explains that the blue Spyder III laser is 2000 times brighter to the human eye, and, at $200, 1/10th the price.

Grab a couple of pairs, reenact the Empire Strikes Back duel, and leave your friend in the hospital! It sounds like prime local television news fodder! Maim the force me with you!

I’m an American. I didn’t choose to be one, nor do I hate being one. But since my parents boned on this side of the Atlantic, I’m an American. As such, I’m required to uphold certain traditions. I always watch the Superbowl. I gorge on buffalo wings until I can’t stand. And I perpetuate a friendly rivalry with the British.

Ah, England — our kooky sister country right across the pond. The nation has exported so many wonders that have improved the quality of my little vacation on planet Earth. Iron Maiden hails from England. So does Mr. Bean. And Love Actually takes place in London. So there’s more than enough reason for us to be chums.

Keep Reading »

Holy fucking shit! I’m still getting people joining in my spanking to Mass Effect 2’s Yeoman Chambers, and next week they may be announcing the final installment in the trilogy? Rly? Srsly? This game is only fucking six months old! I’m not complaining though! I’m feelin’ you, bros! How do we know all this? Why, one handy-dandy leaked FLOOR PLAN:

[via kotaku]

Fuggin’ jawesome, ya’ll. Mass Effect 3 being premiere while my buttlust for the sequel still seeps.

Wolverine’s deep, furious crotch action can only mean one thing! A new fucking Marvel Vs Capcom 3 trailer! This one is a straight-up character teaser. We got Ryu looking butt-hurt, Wolverine with his crotch-groan of fury, Morrigan trying to rub down Iron Man, and other thrilling, exhilarating, creamifying shit going down. Stop listening to me blather. Hit the jump and check out the teaser.

Keep Reading »

Joseph Gordon-Levitt is one hell of an actor. 500 Days of Summer? Word. Brick? Double word. GI Joe? TRIPLE.FUCKING.WORD. And this summer he’s in Christopher Nolan’s Inception. But is the dude in Christopher Nolan’s Batman 3? It just might fucking be!

via slashfilm:

First up, Mr. Gordon-Levitt. This comes from Deadline and Movieline sister gossip site Hollywood Life, which claims that JGL has been tapped to play the Riddler in Batman 3. There’s no substantiation to this, and since we don’t even know if the script is finished (fairly certain it is not) it seems too early to call. But JGL is in Christopher Nolan’s Inception, which makes it a lot easier to believe than almost every other Batman 3 rumor we’ve heard;   supposedly the rumor originated in a joke or comment made on the Inception set. And it certainly seems like a good idea.

For what it’s worth, however, JGL’s reps have already denied this, according to The Wrap. So leave it alone for now and wait for the script to be delivered

So it’s already been denied, but fuck, what does that really mean? At the very least it’s intriguing, and gets my pants in a twist. I’d be on board. Quadruple word!

Jonah Hex is a comics bad ass. He’s a cowboy macabre, an anti-hero that walks not with the law of the land but the law of his conscience. A man of the Wild West, Hex has found himself dealing with thieves, Natives, jailbirds and the goddamn Civil War. Hell, he was even initiated into the Black Lanterns!

Needless to say, dude’s been around the block.

Other than his adventures, Hex is probably best known for his face…or lack thereof. Maybe it was an Apache attack. Maybe he was double-crossed. Or maybe he should’ve used ProActiv and now has to deal with pesky pockmarks. In any case, he’s got a face that only a mother could love.

And that’s where you come in.

To celebrate the release of the Jonah Hex movie (June 18^th), OL is teaming up with the good folks at 43KixBoston. The first five readers to email us photos of themselves doing their best Jonah Hex impressions will win prize packs for the movie. So put on a grimace, toss on a cowboy hat, throw up your best finger-gun, maybe spread some mulch on your face, and send those photos in! Make sure you put “Jonah Hex Contest” in the subject line and include your address in the body so that we can hook up the swag!

We’ll announce the winners by posting their photos right here on OL! Free stuff and exposure on the `Net? It’s almost too good to be true!

Send submissions here: [email protected]

And again, many thanks to 43KixBoston for sponsoring this contest!

http://www.Twitter.com/43kixboston
http://www.facebook.com/43kixboston