I’ve only played the Infinity Ward Call of Duty titles. I am by no means an aficionado or expert when it comes to the series. But when I heard that Black Ops was going to take place in the Cold War, I immediately was aroused to a point of comfortable non-comfort.

And now? Today Treyarch dropped the first multiplayer footage from the game, and I am fapping and screaming. I don’t know if it has been a fixture of previous games in the series, but the video shows dudes getting mowed down with a fucking crossbow.

Good god damn, I’m sold.

Hit the jump to check out the video for yourself.

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You guys want to talk about impressive projectile vomiting? Yeah? Take that shit up with the Sun, our maker, who is doing it as far more impressive speeds than anyone else.

io9:

After nearly a decade of quiet, the Sun is waking up in a big way, and this picture from August 1 shows the most dramatic eruption yet, including a solar flare, a “solar tsunami,” shifting magnetism, shaken corona, and more.

The eruption sent several billion tons of charged particles hurtling towards Earth at 2.2 million miles per hour, or about 1,000 kilometers per second. Fortunately, the effects of the eruption are harmless, even positive, as the eruption’s interaction with Earth’s magnetic field created amazing aurora displays over the northern regions of North America and Europe. This particular solar flare falls in the moderate C-class category. Still, it is possible more severe solar flares will follow, which could disrupt our tech infrastructure both in space (such as satellites) and back here on Earth.

How ridiculous is that? The Sun has a nasty stomach ache, and god damn its letting our solar system know.

[This! Is! Mad Men! recaps the newest developments of Don Draper and his ragtag group of cohorts. In the spirit of the show, it will often be sexist and drunk. Apologies ahead of time.]

Don Draper, I want to believe in you.

You know that I love you, Don. How could I not? You’re charming and handsome. And good at your job. And well-dressed. And a loving father. Hell, you’re even a solid ball player.

But I’m not sure if that’s enough anymore. When we first met, I thought you might be a good person who had made a few mistakes. Then you kept making mistakes. Over and over again. Fugg – even when you clearly knew what the right decision was, you chose the easier, more selfish path.

And yet, I still find myself wanting to believe that you’ll prove to be a decent human being.

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Source: Super Punch

Ohhhhhhhhh, fuck yes. More ridiculously swank-tastic Star Wars sneakers to satisfy your dork fashionista side. This time Adidas is serving up the hotness in Jabba the Hutt, Chewie and Bounty Huntin’ flavors.

Hit the jump to check out the line.

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Source: Templesmith

In preparation for their upcoming tour, Primus spent June in rehearsals. In an altruistic move, the band has released a free 4-song EP recorded during these rehearsals. The tracklisting:

1) Pudding Time

2) American Life

3) Duchess and the Proverbial Mind Spread

4) Harold of the Rocks

It’s nice to hear Les, Larry, and Herb working through these tunes. They don’t contain quite the same rockin’ force of years past but they do have a saavy, laid-back wisdom about them. Also, it’s nice to know that the power-trio isn’t shying away from material written during Tim Alexander’s absence.

In a time where it’s so easy for “artists” to make a buck at every opportunity, it’s nice to know that some people are still about the music.

Source: Mark Rehkopf via Super Punch.

I’ve always felt for Porkins. If you can’t recall him immediately, he’s the fat bastard getting thrown all around his X-Wing in A New Hope. I’ve always speculated his ass was too heavy, and they hadn’t calibrated the shocks to meet his beluga-size donkey trunk. He died a forgotten man while that whiny puke Aryan posterchild Skywalker took all the acclaim.

Well fuck that noise! Now it appears some people are giving him the pop he deserves.

Long like Jek.

"Shhh...It's still supposed to be a secret."

Mark Millar’s Nemesis has been optioned for a film and Tony Scott is going to direct.

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James Stokoe is the internet hotness today, and with good reason. The artist and writer behind Orc Stain as well as Wonton Soup apparently was working on this son of a bitch as a warm-up exercise every day.

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Son of a bitch, you’re saying I may actually have to go to fucking Kmart? There are no words.

Destructoid:

Bethesda has something strange going on with retailer Kmart. With a $5 purchase of the Fallout coaster set seen above, you will get a $15 Video Game Savings coupon that will be redeemable the week of the Fallout: New Vegas release. It’s like a strangely worded pre-order offer with bonus gift. Who cares how it goes down, though. It’s Fallout coasters!

What a weird and strangely enticing promotion. Now, as far as Big Box Middle-America-Smashing Uber-Juggernaut stores go, I’m a Target man myself. But now? Well, Kmart is throwing down the gauntlet. Fighting cheaply, rubbing Fallout: New Vegas goodies in my face.

Frak.