My abandonment at the hands of a concluded True Detective is vicious. Stumbling, snot-nosed, crying through the aisles of 7-Eleven. My slurpee-vomit caked t-shirt displaying Rust’s face. My finger paint execution of said likeness, flawless. Thankfully though, there shall be a Throne soon arriving to quell this hysteria.

Join me in watching a new trailer for the show’s fourth season! Plus! Details about the show’s long term details!

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I haven’t really watched any of the CW’s stable of DC comic adaptations. Gave up on Smallville. Want to watch Arrow but haven’t as of now. Yet even I am a little piqued in the pink-bits at the costume Grant Gustin shall be wearing on the upcoming Flash.

Hit the jump for a full look.

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New Orphan Black trailer! New Orphan Black trailer! Drop down and get your clone on? Or something?

Just hit the jump.

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Dan Harmon. Mitch Hurwitz. Hard to think of two bigger cult heroes in the world of comedic television. (I’m not really thinking hard at all, but I ruminate on their names and I’m like HOLY SHIT THEY’RE BOTH BIG.) Now these two wonderful bastards are working on a project. Together! Can your gaping maw hold their glory thrusts? Mine can!

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True Detective is over. I know this objectively. I also know this emotionally, as the existential chasm that its departure carved out in me has been raging all day! But I shall not despair! Instead I’ll bask in the very early details about the show’s second season.

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Everyone’s favorite distributor of Torture Porn is back in the house. And would you believe despite giving Jack Bauer a respite, the writers of 24: Live Another Day seem to offer nothing new? Even in the trailer? I mean — mentioning that he’s a traitor in the span of a thirty-second trailer? Pretend to do something different, FOX! (Or maybe it’s just the old “If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it. Cause I’ll end up watching anyways.)

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One of the surest signs that you’ve made it as a cultural touchstone is when you begin getting parodied into Oblivion. It appears that True Detective has reached such status. ‘Cause True Detective has taken more than its fair share of (amusing?) potshots this week in anticipation Sunday’s finale. The latest one is courtesy of Joel McHale and Jim Rash of Community (and other sundry successes) fame. 

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Sign me up for this miniseries based on topic and talent alone. Wait — is that really alone, then? Or is it a couple of reasons? Whatever the case, the Guy That Gave Us That Show Everyone Loves and I Need to Watch (Treme, obviously, #trolling) is returning to HBO for an MLK miniseries.

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In the words of Bubbles, this is one beautiful cocksucker right here! I’ve been painfully obsessing over Trailer Park Boys for the past couple of months. Maybe a half a year. Whatever. Fuck you. The mockumentary set in the Canadian province of Nova Scotia details the degenerate, hilarious, usually depressing lives of a local trailer park. It speaks to me on a more specific level, since my family hails from Squirrel Eatin’-Inbred City portions of Nova Scotia. The show itself has been around for a long fucking time, debuting in Canada back in 2001. Now thanks to a spreading popularity courtesy of Netflix, it LIVES AGAIN ON SAID SERVICE.

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GOTHAM. The TV show. Not the perennially destroyed landscape of the movies, or video games. It’s casting people like wut. Like woah. Like wut-woah. (It’s been a long fucking day.) The latest castings are a big one, and an interesting but maybe obvious one. Can that even leave it as interesting? I don’t know, okay? Anyways. The show has picked up its Bruce Wayne. Annnddd…it’s Selina Kyle? Familiar names! Familiar characters! Much recognizable!

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