‘Cause they’re fucking astronauts! They’ll do what they damn well please. Water that acts like fire. Tang. Man, they got all the most glorious shit up there in space. Moon boots. Secret Illuminati bases on Mars. All of that.

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I’m kind of skeptical that this is actually the furthest we’ve seen into space. You know? I ain’t taking anything away from you, Hubble. You’re wonderful. I just suspect that such a news story is laden with unspoken caveats up the ass. But whatever. Let’s just appreciate the beauty together. Hold my hand. Hold it!

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Check out M7! This glorious star cluster is so gods-damned bright that the Romans were capable of seeing it in the night sky. So yeah! Drop down and get your learn on about the collection of about 100 stars that wowed the hair off of Ptolemy’s nips.

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Hubble ain’t fucking around. Despite not being designed to detect clouds and shit in the atmosphere, the plucky son of a bitch is doing it anyways! Oh wow! Oh fuck! How did the telescope pull off such a feat?

Hit the jump to find out! Big market tease! 2014! Fuck yeahhh.

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Astronauts on the ISS are installing what they’re calling a “live” version of Google on the ISS. Whatever could go wrong with this? Besides — you know. The inevitable Robotic Uprising of 2014. Jesus Christ. We’ve given them a perfect perch from where they will be able to monitor the human labor camps, building their 50 foot tall robo-bodies.

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Well, I had no idea. No! Idea! That we weren’t already in the exomoon game. Just sort of figured that all those exoplanets we were spotting had their own luna-esque buddies.

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‘Cause it’s pink! Ya see! You can be tickled pink! By this star-forming region. Oh whatever. Now that you mention it, (I know you didn’t mention it) where does that phrase come from? Tickled to the point of blushing? Man — that seems like fucking assault. Or is it battery? Whatever! Whatever!

Hit the jump for the full image. Plus!, info.

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As I’ve intimated in other places – I don’t care what nation of humanity explores space, or for what reasons. I’m lumping us all together and considering it a win for us barely not-primates. This weekend China landed on the fucking moon. So I’m high-fiving for all of us.

Hit the jump to check it out.

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Europa squirts! Europa erupts! Astronomers have known that Europa has liquid water underneath its surface. Check. Known. However, there has never been direct evidence of said water. Until now.

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Although it is oftentimes bogged down by its own insular squabbling on this planet, humankind has a fascinating propensity to be open-minded about the possibility of intelligent life elsewhere. The unbelievable vastness of the universe coupled with the strangeness of our potentially singular existence within it seems to make many hesitant to commit to the conviction that we are alone. Rather, it’s more understandable to long for others to be with us. After all, if there’s a whole lot of life here, then surely it can conceivably happen somewhere else. And while some believe that here and elsewhere have already mixed and intelligent life forms have visited from afar to our pale blue dot, most supporters hold that there’s a better chance that aliens exist just outside our celestial periphery and will continue to do so until a future time when, with the assistance of technological and even social advancements, we might at last meet. But even without the realistic prospects of such a superior tomorrow in our sight, there remains a genuine willingness to take the necessary steps to get there, to reach out in the hope that we can commence a cosmic dialogue with anyone or anything that might be receptive to a human how-do-you-do.

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