#March2021

Xbox Chief says Bethesda deal is going to deliver “great exclusive games” and maybe my Xbox Series X will get turned on!

xbox bethesda exclusive games

As a gaming glutton, I received the Xbox Series X for Christmas. You know, after already owning a PlayStation 5. However, the motherfucker has sort of just sat there, awaiting exclusive games worth playing. I had a hunch they’d arrive eventually, given the impending Bethesda deal. Now? Now I officially know. Today, the motherfucking Microsoft Czar Phil Spencer confirmed the Bethesda deal is going to deliver “great exclusive games” which is equal parts not surprising and awesome news. For me.

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Microsoft confirms some future Bethesda games will be Xbox and PC exclusive. Fucking obviously.

microsoft confirms future bethesda games exclusive

Microsoft has confirmed what should have been fucking obvious. Namely, some future Bethesda games will be exclusive to XBOX and PC. You don’t spend fucking $7.5 billion to give PlayStation all your dope games.

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Microsoft’s $7.5 billion purchase of Bethesda parent company ZeniMax approved by US and EU regulators. Actually interesting exclusives incoming?

microsoft zenimax acquisition approved

Microsoft’s gotten the green light to buy the fuck out of Bethesda’s parent company, ZeniMax. I think we all sort of thought it was a fait accompli, but now that shit is really happening. And with it? My god! Could, could Microsoft actually have some interesting exclusives? Finally?

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Bethesda has revealed ‘Indiana Jones’ game being developed by ‘Wolfenstein’ crew. This is so fucking radical.

bethesda announces indiana jones game

Hey! Do you need more of a reason to hop on the Microsoft train? Bethesda has announced an Indiana Jones game, and it’s being helmed by the team behind Wolfenstein. I mean, mamma fucking mia! Bethesda (ostensibly) going Microsoft exclusive was already fantastic for the company’s line-up of games. But this absolutely fucking accelerates the situation.

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‘Starfield’ will feature the biggest map of any Bethesda game. Ever. Give me this fucking game!

starfield biggest map of any bethesda game ever

Man, Todd Howard out here talking about Starfield. Talking about how it’s going to feature the biggest map of any Bethesda game ever. Getting my tits hard. I almost wish dude wouldn’t talk about it, so I didn’t have to think about it longingly. Just come at us when you got a release date, Toddy. Stop tickling the tip.

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Microsoft is buying Bethesda and now owns ‘Doom’, ‘Fallout’, ‘Elder Scrolls’, ‘Wolfenstein’ and a shitload of other titles.

microsoft buying bethesda

Mamma mia! Microsoft is buying Bethesda, motherfuckers. And now the company owns, like, an insane amount of renowned franchises. I’d say shots fired in the fucking console wars, but it seems clear Microsoft is more interested in their GamePass subscription service.

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‘Fallout 76’ Teaser Trailer: The Next Installment is an Online Survival RPG (Maybe)

Here’s the teaser trailer for Fallout 76, and a bit more corroborated speculation pertaining to its gameplay. According to multiple sources, it’s going to be an online survival RPG. Which, I’ll admit, is more enticing to me than a fucking Overwatch clone as rumored.

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Bethesda teasing something ‘Fallout’ or maybe, please god yes, ‘Starfield’ related

bethesda teaser fallout starfield

Bethesda is teasing…something, folks. Most think it’s Fallout related, given the classic “Please Stand By Image”, which makes sense. Others like me are hoping it’s a reveal of the long-rumored Starfield. I mean, what if the palette switch means Starfield *takes place* in the Fallout universe?! Whatever the fuck it is, I’m pumped.

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Bethesda may be making ‘Game of Thrones’ game, according to Target leak

bethesda game of thrones game

Well then. Apparently, if a fuck-up at some assuredly demolished and buried Target is to be trusted, Bethesda is making a Game of Thrones game. I’m sure I’ll play it, if it exists, and jack off to it like the sloven I am, if it exists, but still. I would much prefer Bethesda gets releasing with their rumored science-fiction title that’s allegedly in the vein of Skyrim and Fallout.

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Bethesda bringing back ‘Fallout 4’ Pip-Boy edition, prepare to spend too much to look like a herb

bethesda fallout 4 pip-boy game of the year edition

Listen, I’ll be honest. I was fucking bummed that the original Fallout 4 Pip-Boy collector editions so old so fast. That said, make no mistake. Spending that much money for a life size Pip-Boy makes you both extravagant and a total fucking herb. It’s just that, you know, I’m both of those.

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