NASA has dropped the boom on their teased discovery. Seven Earth-sized planets 40 light-years away. Three in the habitable “Goldilocks” zone. Everyone is understandably excited about this news, so let me be a downer. 40 light-years away is more than enough distance for us to never get there, especially since we got like 100 years left on this rotting formerly Blue Marble.
News! Big news! Aliens, it’s gotta be aliens, right? Oh man! Exciting. Sort of. Until you realize we’re destroying ourselves at a fantastic rate, and even getting *out* of this solar system is nearly impossible for us. Man. Really brought down the vibe in here. But, but still, I’m excited.
Cassini, doing what Cassini does. Taking beautiful pictures. Reporting back.
NASA is fixing to send a life-detecting lander to Europa! Hey, detect that life, folks. Cause god knows how much longer we’re going to have it here, right? Too morbid? Too morbid!
This star, this star is definitely going out way cooler than I will. I mean, either I fall down the stairs, or blow a brain gasket from trying to grind out a constipated turd. This star, this star though. Awesome.
Yeah, yeah. We all know about Jupiter’s Great Red Spot. But did you know the titanic fucking plant also has a Little Red Spot?
Hit the jump for a look at its glory.
Venus’ atmosphere got itself a serious. Fucking. Gravity wave. We’re talking 6,000 miles-long serious.
The uh, the Moon is way, way, way older than we thought. Hey! Fuck! Don’t blame me. I’m just a slob who posts banality and stares at asses all day long. Blame one of the SpaceWizards.
Man! I knew it. The fucking Illuminati out there, building Death Stars and shit. Oh sure you can tell me this is a picture of a “moon”, but I really call it “prepping for disclosure” because I ain’t no sucker.