#Space

NASA Has Discovered 7 Earth-sized Planets 40 Light-Years Away

nasa 7 earth-sized planets

NASA has dropped the boom on their teased discovery. Seven Earth-sized planets 40 light-years away. Three in the habitable “Goldilocks” zone. Everyone is understandably excited about this news, so let me be a downer. 40 light-years away is more than enough distance for us to never get there, especially since we got like 100 years left on this rotting formerly Blue Marble.

Cheerio!

Keep Reading »

NASA Announcing A “Discovery Beyond Our Solar System” Tomorrow

nasa announcing discovery beyond our solar system

News! Big news! Aliens, it’s gotta be aliens, right? Oh man! Exciting. Sort of. Until you realize we’re destroying ourselves at a fantastic rate, and even getting *out* of this solar system is nearly impossible for us. Man. Really brought down the vibe in here. But, but still, I’m excited.

Keep Reading »

Space Swoon: Even Dione’s Craters Are Beautiful

cassini dione creusa

Cassini, doing what Cassini does. Taking beautiful pictures. Reporting back.

Keep Reading »

NASA Wants To Send Lander To Europa To Detect Life

nasa europa life detecting

NASA is fixing to send a life-detecting lander to Europa! Hey, detect that life, folks. Cause god knows how much longer we’re going to have it here, right? Too morbid? Too morbid!

Keep Reading »

Space Swoon: Hubble Captures The Fiery Death Of A Star

hubble death of a star

This star, this star is definitely going out way cooler than I will. I mean, either I fall down the stairs, or blow a brain gasket from trying to grind out a constipated turd. This star, this star though. Awesome.

Keep Reading »

Space Swoon: Juno Captures Jupiter’s Little Red Spot

juno jupiter little red spot

Yeah, yeah. We all know about Jupiter’s Great Red Spot. But did you know the titanic fucking plant also has a Little Red Spot?

Hit the jump for a look at its glory.

Keep Reading »

Japanese Spacecraft Observes Gravity Wave In Venus’ Atmosphere

japanese spacecraft venus gravity wave

Venus’ atmosphere got itself a serious. Fucking. Gravity wave. We’re talking 6,000 miles-long serious.

Keep Reading »

The Moon Is Way Older Than Thought; Up To 140 Million Years Older

the moon older than thought

The uh, the Moon is way, way, way older than we thought. Hey! Fuck! Don’t blame me. I’m just a slob who posts banality and stares at asses all day long. Blame one of the SpaceWizards.

Keep Reading »

Space Swoon: Cassini Captures Saturn’s “Death Star” Moon

cassini saturn moon death star

Man! I knew it. The fucking Illuminati out there, building Death Stars and shit. Oh sure you can tell me this is a picture of a “moon”, but I really call it “prepping for disclosure” because I ain’t no sucker.

Keep Reading »

Space Swoon: The Earth And Moon As Seen From Mars

the earth and moon from mars

Want some perspective? Here is the Earth and Moon, as seen from Mars.

Keep Reading »