Tuesday Evening Commute: I Hate It Here


It’s Election Night in America. In fact since I’m tardy writing this (I’m always tardy writing this, this semester!), I’ve had the distinct pleasure of turning off Early Results, closing my Twitter, and instead retreating here. To what has been so admirably dubbed my Space-Oasis, the Space-Ship Omega.

Read the rest of this entry »

Monday Morning Commute: Coping Mechanisms and Caffeine Kicks

Motherfuckin' coping mechanisms.

…and a good day to you too, folks. For those of you here in the Empire, I hope your long weekend was rather enjoyable. Me? Oh, I had myself a blast. Took one off the chin in the world of sporting events (hint), but what the fuck can you do. This weekend also saw the frozen ice guys back on the prowl, with Rendar and myself enjoying a jaunt to the ice chest today ourselves. Local team won, we ate something like ninety-three hot dogs. By the end of the day I was able to smile again, thanks to a little salve on the nips. This is Monday Morning Commute, a column which a list of coping mechanisms we use to get ourselves through the doldrums. Coping mechanisms (video games) for when coping mechanisms (sports teams) fail. System redundancies.

Read the rest of this entry »

WATCH: PRIMUS’ Latest Movie Video, “Lee Van Cleef”

A good amount of my perpetually demented outlook at yonder Existence can be contributed to my adolescent obsession with Primus. I do not much longer listen to the bastards, but my appreciation for the Claypool will never completely ebb. That’s why I’m stoked to check out their latest video, tinged all up in typical Primate fashion.

Read the rest of this entry »

Primus (Still) Sucks! – New (Free) EP!

In preparation for their upcoming tour, Primus spent June in rehearsals. In an altruistic move, the band has released a free 4-song EP recorded during these rehearsals. The tracklisting:

1) Pudding Time

2) American Life

3) Duchess and the Proverbial Mind Spread

4) Harold of the Rocks

It’s nice to hear Les, Larry, and Herb working through these tunes. They don’t contain quite the same rockin’ force of years past but they do have a saavy, laid-back wisdom about them. Also, it’s nice to know that the power-trio isn’t shying away from material written during Tim Alexander’s absence.

In a time where it’s so easy for “artists” to make a buck at every opportunity, it’s nice to know that some people are still about the music.

Friday Brew Review – Brooklyn Local 1

I’m drunk.

It’s not even 7PM and my brain is buzzing as I drown it in poison. Is this healthy? No. Should most people do this? No. But then again, most people don’t spend eight hours hopelessly trying to make a positive impression on the future generation of America. Goddamn, being a high school teacher is depressing. It wouldn’t be half as bad if I didn’t truly believe that the vast majority students I’m trying to reach are too beyond repair, already suckered into the myopic structure of feed/fuck/entertain/distract me now, I don’t give a shit about later. Ah well.

Tonight, I’m drinking Brooklyn Local 1. I picked up this beer for a few reasons. Firstly, I have a profound respect for the brewery’s other products. Secondly, this motherfucker came in a big bottle, providing one pint & 9.4 fluid ounces of goodness to my gullet. And lastly, I was (of course) taken in by the label’s advertising of 9% ABV. Through and through, Brooklyn Local 1 seemed like a good choice.

And as far as my Friday night is concerned, it has been. Truthfully, I’m at a loss for words. I don’t know how to really describe the beverage’s flavor. It’s a bit hoppy. It’s a bit dry. It’s drinkable and refreshing. Overall, it just tastes like a good beer. Nothing exceptional to take note of, but nothing terrible to decry either.

Read the rest of this entry »