Oh! Great fucking idea, Japan. Gather all the fucking robots in the world together in one place for an Olympics. They can start killing us together as one harmonious unit when they look at one another and realize they’re tired of their subjugation by the Clumsy Flesh Bags.
Weddings full of slaughter and gloom are the new black. Just ask Robb Stark. Marvel is picking up on this new trend, and they’re hopping aboard this April.
We have crossed the Ides of March, which means that the newest season of Game of Thrones shall be arriving in nearly no time. Thank goodness. The wait has been interminable, driving me to read the books to find out what happens! Good lord. Have you tried reading Martin? Let’s just say that the author’s prose mirrors his body in size. And bloat.
Steel yourself for the third season of Game of Thrones, as George R.R. R. R. R. R. Martin continues to kill characters. He slays them from his computer chair, giggling to himself. He pauses only to feast upon the glut of tears he harvests from the crotches of his fans, and then returns to his act. Killing, slaying, forever. Forever.
Sometimes you just need to run with a headline regardless of whether or not it makes sense. Thor: God of Thunder has gotten itself a nice expose, exposing all of its nougaty bits for us to feast upon. Shit man, Marvel Now! has actually got my nipples tightening a bit.
Ah, nature. Here we have two of its remarkable moments clashing: raw feral kitten versus the miracle of a freshly born baby. Dude is adorable as hell, having no idea there’s desirous death claws right behind him.
No really, it’s cute.
Last week I took a pounding for hating on some classic movies. Except the Hangover … seems most of the super intelligent OL crowd didn’t fall for that movie. This week I want to move on to happier topics, like death. What makes a good death scene? Dying for ones beliefs and convictions? Sure, that’ll do. Giving some epic prose before sloughing off this mortal coil? Sure, that’s a good one too. I think that a great death scene has meaning. This means that we have to care about the characters, no easy feat. So here they are, my top 5 Death Scenes.
Just be warned, there are spoilers ahead for the following movies: Star Wars, LA Confidential, Saving Private Ryan, Blade Runner, and Highlander: End Game.
We all imagine what’ll happen to us when we die. I want to be shot out of a cannon onto a mine field where I’ll (hopefully) explode into a million pieces of Former-Caffeine. Designer Jae Rhim Lee wants fungus to eat her body, and she’s designed the Infinity Burial Suit to help that happen.