#Welcome To the Future
DARPA Director Leaves PENTAGON For GOOGLE. Skynet Confirmed
If the Metal Gear Solid series taught me anything, it was that long-winded existential masturbation sessions can get old. It was news to me. If the series taught me two things, it was that DARPA is a bunch of future-killing robo-bastards. Now that DARPA director Regina Dugan is stepping down to take a job at Google the obvious is confirmed: Google is Skynet.
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Tweets Can Now Be Cited In Academic Papers. This Is Awesome.
Tweets can now be cited in academic papers. Many will recoil over this. I fucking love it.
LulzSec Leader Betrays All Of Anonymous. Leads To Huge Arrests. F**k This Guy.
The Matrix is under attack, yo. Would-be ringleader of Anonymous and leader of LulzSec Hector Xavier Monsegur has reportedly sold out both organizations, and has be tugging government dongle for months. What a fuck.
BitTorrent Pirates Agree To Switch From Xvid to x264. I Nod Blankly
If you download TV series every once in a while – god condemn you! *cough* – you may notice a change in your file format. The people “responsible for the highest quality, earliest infringing video releases” have come together and decided to dump Xvid for x264. I’m impressed these people have some sort of quorum.
ANONYMOUS Members Tricked Into Installing Malware. Whoops
Anonymous. Take down a lot of giants by the ankles. Biting and pinching and fighting unfairly. Even the gnats take one off the chin every once in a while, though. The security wizards at Symantec think the legion may have gotten themselves hacked up during a January DDoS attack.
Video: Microsoft Pimps Kinect-Enabled Shopping Cart. Sloth ++
Listen, let’s all calm down with bringing the Skynet Cylon revolution into our fucking grocery stores. Well, anymore than it already is. I mean, laziness is good and all. I get it. You want to be fat. You want to ride your scooters around Walmart while you buy shit you don’t need. That said, we need to draw the line somewhere. I’m drawing it at having a Kinect-enabled Fascist Robot Shopping Cart point out when you’re buying the wrong spaghetti.
Hit the jump for more info, and the horror.
Printer Can Print Human Tissue For Drug Testing. No Words. No. Words.
A wizardlicious start-up named Organovo uses a 3D printer to blow your fucking mind. More specifically, with less vulgarity: they use a 3D printer to build a variety of human tissue types. Just go reread that sentence.
Then hit the jump.
Google Releasing Augmented Reality Glasses. Futurism ++
Ain’t this a real tickle to my futurism taint. Google is going to release augmented reality glasses. They aren’t the contacts/retinal implants I’m clamoring for, but they’re a start.
Mattel Finally Releasing Hoverboard From ‘Back To The Future’. Praise Be!
Holy balls!, the hoverboard from Back To The Future is finally getting some love in the tangible form. All right, so it doesn’t exactly hover. The makers do claim that it “glides over most surfaces”, which is more than good enough for my manchild ass.
Hit the jump for details and pictures.
