#Video Games
‘Mario World’: Or Why Mario Would Crap His Pants.
Enlarge. | Via. | By Alexey Mikhaylov.
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PS3 Hacker Geohot Has Fled To South America. Where the Rhymes At Now?
Ah, Geohot. Fuck you, kid. You thought you were so ballin’ cracking the PS3 and giving out its root key. So confident you put up a painful YouTube diss track talking shit about Sony. Clearly you’re now feeling the heat that I predicted. The law, and more importantly, the robot ninjas are on your tail. And you’ve fled, fled to South America.
Kinect Hacked To Create ‘Eye of Sauron’ For The Office.
Some enterprising people went ahead and created an ‘Eye of Sauron’ using Microsoft Kinect, WPF, and openni. The result is a creepy fucking eye that can track people walking by, promising death and gloom to everyone it catches within its gaze.
Hit the jump to check out the video.
Ken Levine: PS Move In BioShock Would ‘Cheat’ Gamers.
Ken Levine. I wank off to your philosophical wanderings and universal construction in BioShock. You are a good man. Full of win. Now you’re further full of win, and uh, a gooder man with your latest musings on PS Move.
Kinect Hack Turns You Into Rampaging Hulk; Sensor Smash Or Something.
Some good lads have gone and built a Kinect ‘Hulk’ mod. They did so by hooking up “Flash running w/ Molehill (hardware acceleration) up to the Kinect and Box2d.” That means absolutely nothing to me though. I just know it tints then green and lets them smash generated buildings and shit.
As dope as it is, I think Owen Good has it right when he describes it as more of a call back to old school Rampage than Mr. Banner. Still though, dope.
Hit the jump for the video.
First Person Mario: The Plumber Goes Bulletstorm.
Brandon Laatsch created a 3DSMax animation that imagined good old fucking Super Mario Bros. as a first person experience with absurd achievements like in Bulletstorm. If only this gem was real.
Hit the jump for the video.
Final Mass Effect DLC ‘Arrival’ Drops On March 29.
Oh hell yeah! Mass Effect 2 is getting its final DLC ‘Arrival’ on March 29. This is fucking righteous for two reasons. Firstly, it’s more Mass Effect 2. Secondly, it’s hopefully confirmation that the motherfucking third installment is coming this winter. Hopefully. BioWare promised to bridge Mass Effect 2 and Mass Effect 3 through DLC, and it appears they weren’t stunting. The premise of Arrival is that Shepard is “sent to the edge of the galaxy to rescue an undercover operative who may have evidence of an imminent Reaper invasion.”
Fucking righteous.
Hit the jump for some teaser screens.
The Riddler Is All Up In Batman: Arkham City.
The Riddler isn’t just some sidegame in Arkham City like he was in the first Batman game by Rocksteady Studios. No sir. According to Destructoid, The Riddler won’t be “just be taunting Batman this time around, but would have a physical presence in the world of Arkham City.”
Outstanding.
Hit the jump for a few new images of Mr. Nygma and Bats.
DEFEAT. 025 – Golden Years
[DEFEAT. is Rendar Frankenstein’s truest attempt at fiction. Presented in weekly episodes, the novella tells the tale of Daryl Millar – a hero who dies at the intersection of pop culture, science-fiction, war epic, and fantasy]
“So you really don’t think that the newest one is any good?”
“Listen, I didn’t say it’s not good!”
“Well, you kinda did when–”
“Damn it, 8-Bit! You always do this! You take something I say and then you spin it so that the meaning is completely different!” Riff was exasperated, partly because his friend was busting his balls and partly because he had failed to adequately express himself.
8-Bit removed his glasses, inspecting the lenses for grime. He held them up to GameWorld’s neon sign, which shone brighter than ever against the black night sky. It’s a strange thought — the clearest messages appear when the least number of people are around to receive them. Doesn’t matter, though. Most people don’t even heed the warnings they actually pick up on. But then again, there’s always one or two that do.
The nine brilliant letters cut their way through the blackness, helping the nerd clean his spectacles. Even as they got smaller during the walk home, the characters of GameWorld’s sign would forever read like a beacon of comfort to 8-Bit.
With vision regained, the dialogue continued. “Ok, let me get this straight. You said, and I quote, ‘Why the fuck would they use synthesizers? The damn things ruin the album!’ What was I supposed to take from that?”
Riff paused for a moment, trying to figure out how to undermine his friend’s well-crafted strategy. “Well…Are you sure I said that?”
“I’m positive.”
“I don’t know. It’d been about an hour since you had to feed the BurgerTime machine a quarter, and I’m not sure your attention was completely dedicated to my musical analysis.” Riff knew his argument was nothing other than a bluff.
8-Bit turned around, looking back the sign that was now a mere neon blur. He had spent the better part of the evening at the arcade and would still be there now had the manager not politely asked him to “Get the fuck outta here kid! I know you’ll be back tomorrow! The machines ain’t going nowhere!” 8-Bit couldn’t fend off Riff’s argument; after all, he had slipped into a state of nirvana, a period ensconced in tranquility, while gaming.
Levelheaded, he offered his counterpart the benefit of the doubt, “All right, maybe I misheard you. What did you say?”
Riff scrambled. “Well, what I had said was that I’m not sure exactly how I feel about the synthesizers in Somewhere in Time. I mean, the record’s been out for almost a month and I still don’t know just how much I like it. Which is fucked up, because it’s Iron Maiden!”
BioWare Caught Reviewing Dragon Age 2. Well, That’s One Way To High Scores.
Despite its flaws, I like me some Dragon Age 2. It’s repetitive, there’s like four locations, and fetch quests rule the day. Wait, I think that may all fall under repetitive. Shit. Shitfuck. When even Dragon Age 2 apologists like myself have some serious complaints, a company must do something. Developer Chris Hoban has done just that, taking to Metacritic to review the game. With a 10/10.
