[This! Is! Mad Men! recaps the newest developments of Don Draper and his ragtag group of cohorts. In the spirit of the show, it will often be sexist and drunk. Apologies ahead of time.]

Don Draper, I want to believe in you.

You know that I love you, Don. How could I not? You’re charming and handsome. And good at your job. And well-dressed. And a loving father. Hell, you’re even a solid ball player.

But I’m not sure if that’s enough anymore. When we first met, I thought you might be a good person who had made a few mistakes. Then you kept making mistakes. Over and over again. Fugg – even when you clearly knew what the right decision was, you chose the easier, more selfish path.

And yet, I still find myself wanting to believe that you’ll prove to be a decent human being.

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[This! Is! Mad Men! recaps the newest developments of Don Draper and his ragtag group of cohorts. In the spirit of the show, it will often be sexist and drunk. Apologies ahead of time.]

In the Spirit of the Season

Right off the bat, I’m going to issue a complaint about last night’s episode of Mad Men. My grievance doesn’t pertain to the writing, directing, acting, or production — all of this was superb. Instead, I’m going to whine because it’s only August and this is a Christmas episode. It’s just too early to be this damn fired up about the most wonderful time of the year! I just know I’m going to spend the next four months writing and proofing a letter to Santa, scouring supermarkets for eggnog, and staying up late to listen for sleigh bells.

But seriously, congrats Mad Men – you’re now in league with all those other shows with sick Christmas episodes.   I’ll definitely re-watch this episode on December 24^th.

Okay, let’s bite into the sweet pulp that is Christmas Comes But Once a Year.

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Alright, I’m just going to come out and say that I’ve pretty much given up on ever genuinely enjoying this show like I once did. Perhaps it was a delusion, some sort of apparition or glamouring that tricked me into thinking this show was dope. But at this point, it comes off like a mush of romance and homoerotic tension. And while I am typically a lover of both romance and homoerotic tension, I’m pretty sure that from now on True Blood will be spent counting the time until a real show comes on.

I’ve figured out that this current season can be broken down into three distinct entities.

1. Eric Northman Cock Teases Everyone
King Dandyfuck, or whatever his name is, killed Eric’s dad. Who was a King. And now in a manner to ingratiate himself into the King’s inner circle in an effort to ultimately kill him, he’s begun hitting on him. And King Dandyfuck’s husband. I dug this at first, since I imagined myself being hit on by Eric and I glowed a bit inside. Then it just sort of kept going, and I’m like, alright dude, do something.

But he isn’t content just cock-teasing King Dandyfuck and the king’s typically flamboyant husband. He also spends a good amount of time growling and making comments at Sookie, and then Sookie is like “Roar roar I’ll never forgive you, roar roar, gap-toothed annoyingness.” So Eric walks around a lot in tight-fitting shirts and running his finger up and down people’s stomachs. Every episode. Forever.

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[This! Is! Mad Men! recaps the newest developments of Don Draper and his ragtag group of cohorts. In the spirit of the show, it will often be sexist and drunk. Apologies ahead of time.]

Season four of Mad Men has finally arrived! Thank the Maker! I thought this day would never dawn (or is that, Don?), but alas, here we are!

Okay, time for a minor confession — I’ve only recently gotten into AMC’s hit. And by recently, I mean that I watched the first three seasons in a span of about three weeks.   The exploits of Madison Avenue’s finest have captivated me in a way that no show has for about five years. And by captivated, I mean that I’ve spent hours in front of my glowing televisor-box, jamming cereal into my face and drooling over Jon Hamm.

Hey mister, don’t pass that judgment-crud on me! As a teacher, it’s my goddamn right to enjoy the summer any way that I see fit. In a month’s time, I’ll be back to raising your kids for you and weeping. So for the present, I read the books I’m actually interested in and I watch DVDs.

Anyways, the fourth season’s premiere pushes the narrative forward about a year. This time has been quite eventful for Mr. Draper, with long-lasting consequences burrowing their way into all facets of his life.

Professionally, Don has helped launch the new agency (Sterling Cooper Draper Pryce — doesn’t that just sound fantastic?!) into a realm of legitimacy, getting them out of a hotel room and into actual offices. The environment isn’t quite as splendid as it was in years past, but there is a sense that work is being done for the right reasons.

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Pic: Most Smartest.

Mad Men season four kicks off tonight. Frothing and fapping.

Season four of Dexter ended me with saying two things a) holy fucking shit, 1) this would be a perfect ending to the show, b) holy fucking shit, and 2) what the fuck are they going to do now? It was a pants-filling moment of bliss. Today at SDCC the trailer for the fifth season was released, and its got my excitement thrusting – into guts of glory! No, I don’t know.

As an aside, look at Quinn in the trailer! Cheekbones like wut! He spent his first two seasons being a puffy mess. I’m impressed. But when you’re going to be the douchebag analog for Doakes sent to hunt Dexter, I suppose you have to be in deec shape.

Hit the jump to check out the trailer.

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Perhaps the only thing I am looking forward to as much as Inception in my life is the season four premiere of Mad Men. JULY 25, WHERE ART THOU!?

Jeph Loeb as Marvel Executive VP, and Head of Television? Oh noes.

via comics alliance:

Marvel Entertainment has announced that Jeph Loeb, writer of comic books like “Batman: The Long Halloween” and “Ultimatum,” has been named an Executive Vice-President and Head of Television at the company. Loeb, who previously worked as a writer and Co-Executive Producer on the Emmy-nominated NBC superhero TV show “Heroes” and a writer and producer on “Lost” and the Superman series “Smallville,” will be tasked with developing both animated and live-action television projects for Marvel properties as well as direct-to-DVD content.

Jeph Loeb used to be awesome. Superman: For All Season, The Long Halloween, and other tales were fantastic. He used to be one of my favorite writers. But for awhile he’s been meddling in the gulches of bullshit, penning titles that are so painfully painful, they’re either meta-amusing, or like watching your Dad trying to slow dance at some club. His “edgy” storylines on Ultimatum and Ultimates 3 were train wrecks, and either elicited groans or sympathy.

To be fair though, he has been in charge of Smallville, and despite ripping off Watchmen for Heroes, both of them were eminently watchable. Perhaps the dude is more suited for the moving pictures these days.

I don’t want to be too harsh, like I said, Loeb’s penned some excellent, excellent stuff in his lifetime, and has more creative talent in his used toilet paper than I ever will. But like Claremont, I will be forever grateful for his past work, while skeptical of his future endeavors.

[click to enlarge]

Fuck yes. Counting down to the return of my favorite show currently airing.

Yeah, I ain’t got any words. Just check it out.