#Television
Arrested Development Is Getting Another Season of TV. And A Movie. God Loves Us.
I didn’t believe that we were ever going to get an Arrested Development movie. For some reason the Good Lords have decided to smile on us, blessing us not only with a movie but with another fucking season of television? Can it be?
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Netflix Signs DreamWorks Animation, Amazon Signs Fox For Streaming. Battle On!
Just today I was wondering when the fuck Fringe was going to get up on the Netflix tip so I could finally watch it. Get the discs? Pshaw! I’m lazy. Well it may be going up soon, just on Amazon’s streaming service. Today Amazon and Netflix both announced huge streaming signings.
Video: ‘Game of Thrones’ Season 2 Teaser Is Insignificant, Exciting.
There’s an official teaser for the second season of Game of Thrones. It’s almost nothing. It also has me fucking pumped anyways.
Monday Morning Commute: Heart-Failin’ Classics
It’s Monday.
Driving to work this morning, I saw a BMW pulled over in the breakdown lane. Hazards flashing. Black smoke billowing out from under the hood. The middle-aged driver pulled himself through the open sunroof, stood upright as though he were First Man emerging from the primordial birth canal, shook his balled-up fist at the sky, and let loose a guttural wail that cut through the nonsense-talkers inside of my radio-box. His briefcase was launched onto a station wagon, in the process cracking its windshield and scaring the illegal immigrants riding inside. He then slipped, fell off of the roof, and got to his feet just in time to spit blood into my open passenger side window as I drove by.
In my rear view, I saw him whip out his dick while strangling himself with his tie.
It’s Monday.
As such, it’s my pleasure to welcome you to the MONDAY MORNING COMMUTE! This is the spot where we share our panaceas for work-induced ennui and existential fatigue. After I show you the cocktail I’ll be using, hit up the comments section and show off your own self-medications.
AMC Extends Running Time Of ‘Mad Men’, Oh My Draper.
It feels like Mad Men has been off the air for fucking ever, thanks to arguments and slap-fights and contractual wrangling between series creator Matthew Weiner and AMC. The good news is that when the son of a bitch returns, it’ll be at a slightly extended running time.
Awesome.
Peter Dinklage Wins Emmy For ‘Game of Thrones’ Role. Tyrion Justice.
Peter Dinklage is so excellent in his portrayal of Tyrion on Game of Thrones that I usually take him for granted. Oh another excellent performance. Yawn! But he fucking owns as the Imp. Owns! And while I usually don’t give a fuck about awards shows, for some reason I take a good gleam to the news that Dinklage has cleaned up with an Emmy.
Face of a Franchise: Daredevil
[face of a franchise presents two individuals that’ve fulfilled the same role. your task — choose the better of the two and defend your choice in the rancor pit that is the comments section]
Since his debut in 1964, comics fans (especially those that love to exclaim Make mine Marvel, muthafuckah!!!) have been wowie-zowied by the antics of Daredevi, the man without fear! Despite hitting the scene in a costume ridiculous even by comics standards, Daredevil won over fans by beating all sorts of criminal ass at night while maintaining a successful law practice during the day as Matt Murdock.
Pretty, pretty, pretty, pretty good.
Also, the guy’s blind. Which makes his feats even more spectacular. I mean, Ray Charles was cool as hell, but I don’t think he’d handle a trampoline half as well as Murdock.
Also tack on the fact that bad-ass writers seem to gravitate towards Daredevil (historically – Frank Miller/recently – Ed Brubaker), and it’s clear why the character is afforded such genuine respect. The mouthbreathin’, anti-social panel-worshippers that I count myself amongst fucking love Daredevil.
Fortunately, the admiration for this Marvel Knight has been truly honored by the two men fearless enough to portray him in live-action.
If for no other reason, 1989 was a wonderful year because it saw the release of The Trial of the Incredible Hulk, a made-for-TV movie continuing the adventure that began in The Incredible Hulk series. Of course, any time that a Marvel character goes on trial, there’s only one man to turn to for help: Attorney Matt Murdock! The hero of Hell’s Kitchen was portrayed by Rex Smith, the only man brave enough to ride the Street Hawk! Although relegated to a supporting role, Smith’s interpretation of Daredevil as a ninjutsu-lookin’ legally-blind lawyer that helps a green gargantuan is simply chilling.
Whereas Rex Smith’s Daredevil is a one-round knockout, Ben Affleck’s portrayal is a twelve-round slugfest. After blowing away audiences with Reindeer Games, Affleck was given his second once-in-a-lifetime role in 2003’s Daredevil. In this dark vision of the Daredevil mythos, Matt Murdock not only has to fight Bullseye, but the entire Green Mile as well! Proving himself to be a world-class thespian, Affleck navigated his way through playground battles with Elektra, Irish guys with facial scars, and a soundtrack that includes both Nickelback and Hoobastank.
A miracle performance. Nothing less.
So who do you think is the superior Daredevil? The dude from the TV-movie that no one remembers or the dude from the movie no one likes?
Rex Smith or Ben Affleck?
Netflix To Lose One-Million Customers Over Pricing. Not me!
Netflix changed its pricing this summer splitting up the physical and streaming options, in what some have speculated it was in anticipating of licensing fees or something. Or something. Cheesed off a lot of people. Apparently something like a million.
‘Source Code’ Becoming a TV Show On CBS. Can We Jump Back And Prevent This? LOL.
I dug Source Code. I love Duncan Jones. I’m totally not interested in a Source Code television show.
Monday Morning Commute: rocket-burns and moonshine dreams
Welcome to the MONDAY MORNING COMMUTE! This is the feature I use as an excuse to showcase the various debris that’ll be keeping my brain-bone lubricated so as to avoid jamming up at the hands of the workweek. Some Mondays, I write a little story beforehand as a creative writing exercise and preface the post with it. On other Mondays, I start the post by jotting down an amusing anecdote
And then there’re those Mondays when I’m so tired that my eyes are burning and I don’t have any goddamn coffee filters so kickstarting my creativity with a caffeine-defibrillator isn’t an option and all I want to do is pass out and wake up in 2013 so that I can laugh at all those fucking doomsayers and tell them that their apocalypse wasn’t even worth being awake for.
Guess what kind of Monday today is.
Quit’yer dinkin’ around, let’s do this.
