[via cbr]

Marvel dropped the first picture from the Thor movie today. And you know what? I am fucking loving it. Dude looks bad ass. I’ll wield his hammer! Hahahaha. I AM MIGHTY ENOUGH F U.

I used to work in a run-down mom & pop video store. Without any real customers, I had more than enough free time to watch some really awesome shitty movies. One of my favorites was MVP 2 – Most Vertical Primate. The premise is pretty simple; in the first MVP the monkey was really good at hockey but now he’s good at skateboarding. It’s amazing. I mean think about it, it’s a fucking monkey on a goddamn skateboard! What’s not to love?

I tried to find the trailer and was successful…but it’s in German (I think). In a way, I think watching this movie in another language (and high) would only make it better. Which, I had previously thought was impossible.

[via popoholic]

It’s not fair.

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This shit is righteous. If you haven’t been able to figure out my insane ass-crush on Tony Stark, RDJ, and the Man of Iron, you haven’t been paying attention. This remix of the trailers have my pale, pasty, cottage-cheese ass booty poppin’. Here’s the full-scoop:

via slashfilm:

San Francisco-based audio/video mash-up artist/performer Mike Relm has created a cool remix of the Iron Man 2 trailer. Director Jon Favreau saw it and even showed it to the Paramount marketing department.

Warren Ellis is the most intriguing figure currently in comics. He’s fueled by energy drinks, alcohol, and cigarettes. Despite his disdain for them, his superhero stories stand above the rest. And his creator-owned properties are just out of fucking control. Every writer should aspire for Ellis’ mastery.

The trailer for Captured Ghosts, a 2011 documentary about the scribe, has hit the infonets. Peep that shit:

Is that dirty enough for you?

It’s getting there.

Between RDJ, Scarlett Johansson, and ridiculous techno-gadgets, I swear to god my groin is going to explode during Iron Man 2. Hit the jump for the video.

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I’ve been sick recently. Really sick. As in, “We’re sorry Mr. Krueger, but we have no fucking clue what’s wrong with you!” Guesswork in white coats? Perhaps. But I’d rather take my chances with the guesswork of our 2010 medicine men than try to fight this shit on the Oregon Trail. Huzzah for being born in the future!

With nothing to do but sit around and hope Joe Black doesn’t try to filch my soul, I’ve been watching far more television than normal. Most of it has been garbage, but I’ve caught a few gems here and there. One of the best things I’ve seen in the past few days has been Stephen King’s Silver Bullet.

The 1985 flick takes place in a yokel town in Maine (where else, Stephen King, where else?!) that just happens to come under werewolf-attack. Every month, some poor sap gets torn to shreds and the townsfolk chalk it up to a regular, human maniac. Then Corey Haim figures out what’s going on, but no one believes him because he’s in a wheelchair. Well, his Uncle Gary Busey believes him but he’s an alcoholic so you know how that goes. Seriously, if I had a nickel for every time a good monster hunt went sour because of a drunk relative, well, I’d have twenty cents.

This movie is pretty fucking sweet. It’s got werewolves, swear words, bloody mutilations, rocket-powered wheelchairs, John Locke, and an evil priest. It definitely feels like a ridiculous 1980’s flick and I should hope that you’ll enjoy it as such.

Whedonnites, prepare! to! fap!

via slashfilm:

Variety, in a confirmation of Whedon’s hiring two days ago, says that he’ll rewrite The Avengers. He’s got plenty of experience writing superhero teams and for ensemble casts, so that, again, was pretty much a foregone conclusion. But as The First Avenger: Captain America, set to shoot soon, is basically a lead-in to the big team movie, should Whedon do some work on that script, too?Pajiba says that’s exactly what he’s going to do. The site has “a source close to the project,” who says that Whedon is likely to be assigned a rewrite on Cap. That’s all the site really has, but given that the word I’ve heard about the Captain America script hasn’t been terribly positive, it’s certainly a rumor I’d like to believe.

I’m totally fucking stoked that Joss Whedon is rewriting The Avengers and Captain America. For starters, the first draft of The Avengers was by Zak Penn. He wrote X3. I rest my case. When I heard he was the guy behind The Avengers, a single tear fell from my eyes, and I said, “Well, it could be worse, they could cast Johnny Storm as Captain America.”

I’m kidding. I’m really almost sort of over that.

And despite the fact that Whedon rewriting the movies means that they’re going to be filled with existential angst, vampires, and atheism, I’m okay with it.

Let’s get this out of the way. I thought Dollhouse was a steaming ball of fuckhate. But I like Joss Whedon. A lot. Not as much as some of the people I’ve seen, who build monuments to him out of their own pubic hair and ripped-up Firefly t-shirts they lost their virginity in. But I do. And I was pretty worried about the Avengers movie, so hearing that he’s probably going to be directing it? I am gladdened by it.

via slashfilm

On April Fool’s Day, IESB   had the bad timing to report that Joss Whedon   was on the shortlist to direct The Avengers for Marvel. Really bad timing for that scoop – while Whedon is the sort of guy a lot of fans would like to see on this film, there was too much reason to be skeptical when it ran on April 1. The LA Times confirmed that shortlist a few days later, but even then it was tough to tell if the studio   was serious, or just spitballing in the same way it seemed to do with the Captain America casting.Either way, things are evidently serious now, as there’s a report that Whedon is in final talks to direct the film.

I can only imagine the amount of fluids being excreted by fanboys and fangirls if this shit comes to consummation.

Jay: You’re fucking kidding me! The Easter bunny did this?
Brodie: All I said was that the Easter bunny at the Menlo Park mall was more convincing and he just jumped the railing and knocked me down.
Jay: He’s fucking dead!
Brodie: Oh let it go, he’s under a lot of pressure.
[T.S. and Gwen approach them]
T.S. Quint: What the hell happened?
Jay: The guy in the Easter bunny suit kicked his ass.
Brodie: I had it coming.
Jay: [to Silent Bob] Fuck all that shit. Come on, Silent Bob.