#December2011
Screenwriter For New ‘Blade Runner’ Announced Soon According To Producer.
Hot off the tits of the Prometheus trailer comes some more Ridley Scott dancing in the glory days news. New Blade Runner flick be getting a screenwriter announced soon.
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‘The Legend of Zelda’ Gets Official Timeline. Two People Who Care Are Stoked.
I’ve never tried to make much of the Legend of Zelda timeline. Just rolled with it. Where everything fits in? Who gives a fuck. There’s the Temples of Fire, Water, Might, Youthful Enthusiasm and Shadow Lords every game, and a lass who needs saving. That’s always been enough. For people who demand more!, who demand coherency!, you can now relax. The timeline hast been revealed.
Small Planets Dived Into Their Sun, And Survived. Boss Mode!
Often I think of only Kal-El being able to dive into Sol and emerge victorious. Apparently that shit ain’t true. Tiny charred-as-Vader’s-dome-piece planets have done the exactly same thing. Flex on, Planets. You deserve it.
Video: World Masturbating Champ Masanobu Sato’s Own Mini Doc.
Documentaries! A powerful format of thinly veiled fiction constructed to invigiorate the mind! To alert people to beauties and problems across the world! To…to…to capture a behind the scenes look at Masanobu Sato, the world’s masturbation champion. Pretty safe for work video after the jump.
Capcom Opening Their Own Bar. Get Drunk, Hadouken All Over Yourself.
A match made in Heaven. Capcom and a drinking establishment. Wait, what?
Marvel Senior VP Smack Talks DC’s “Returnability Ponzi Scheme”. It’s On!
DC is doing itself something of a swag-heavy dance these days, trumping their magnificent sales. I’ll admit, I was sampling the cheddar popcorn they were selling. Not smackin’ lips on their claims? Marvel senior VP Tom Brevoort. A man who launched an impressive volley of words.
Press Start!: Obama Funds Socialist Groups With Skyrim Farming.
Oh, hello there friends. How is the Internet treating you today? Reblog that animated gif of the cat skulking quick on Tumblr and come back to me. I’ll wait. You here? Aiight, ballin’. This here is Press Start! It’s a gaming column turned Nonsense Collective where we chat about the week in gaming. Pour yourself a glass of your favorite drink – but Jesus Christ if you’re a friend of Bill W. don’t break your fucking sobriety this close to Christmas on my accord – and let’s chat the Light Polygonal. I list five things that caught my eye in gaming this week, and you retort with clearly superior choices. I’ll nod, praise you, and we’ll all leave happy.
Why Miles Davis? ‘Cause with swag that hard he goes where he wants.
Televised Days of Christmas: Santa Claus and the Tenth Avenue Kid
[Is there a better way to celebrate the manger-birth of a superpowered messiah-baby than watching television? Hell no! Join Rendar Frankenstein as he navigates Spaceship OL through the Televised Days of Christmas!]
If pop culture’s taught us anything about Christmas, it’s that it’s the season of redemption. This is the one time of the year during which even the most miserably misanthropic and criminally corrupt are susceptible to the suggestion that underneath their callused exteriors beat hearts of joy and peace and altruism. Even the most seemingly formidable of Yuletide foes have been felled by the most wonderful time of the year.
Ebeneezer Scrooge. The Grinch. Frank Cross.
If the very avatars of greed and contempt are knocked out by Kris Kringle’s right hook, what chance does a run-of-the-mill reprobate stand? Is Christmas magic only reserved for the worst examples of the human condition, or can it be sprinkled on those individuals residing in the darker grey shades of morality? What happens when a lifetime of misdirection is intercepted by holiday responsibility?
Well, when we take a look at the exchange between Santa Claus and the Tenth Avenue Kid it becomes clear that Christmas offers hope not just for sinners and saints, but antiheroes and unlikely champions as well.
SWTOR Could Learn Something From Porn Site Billing, F**king Sh*t.
There are times when the blue-veined monster whispers nothing-sense to me. It coos at me, driving down my already dessiccated and marooned on the side of my consciousness sense of Rationality. It tells me to do things. From with the dank Dagobah that is my swampy set of boxer briefs, it commands me. Put in your credit card information. Click those buttons. Sign up for that porn site. Dance, monkey! Dance, dinky! Soon all shall be right with the world. Let the buxom shake, let the artificial moans wash over you. Spend your money, do it, do it!
Joss Whedon: ‘The Avengers’ Won’t Be ‘Obnoxiously 3D’, Doesn’t Admit 3D Sucks.
In what was a pretty obvious move, today Disney announced that they were wunder-converting The Avengers into stupendous 3D. Whedon says don’t panic though, it isn’t going to be total balls.
