…We just need to quit wars. I mean, makes sense to me. Who the fuck knows what we’d do in the ways of weaponization the moment our Alien Overlords gave us infinite-energy crystals and sustainable thrust engines. Right? This Former Canadian Defense Minister is only spitting unvarnished truth.

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Hello, friends! Be you long-time wards of the Spaceship, or recent innocent bystanders gobbled up by last weekend’s Fan Expo in Toronto. This column right here is Monday Morning Commute, a weekly installment where we blather about the various things we’re indulging in during a given week. A list of the ointments we shall be applying to the burn of Existence. Too overwrought? Too grandiose? Post a fucking list of the shit you are getting down with over the course of the next seven days.

Ah, better.

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Hey, this is totally awesome. We’re going to be able to store data for millions of years on these neat sapphire discs. Nothing will ensure our shame like when the Martians return, wondering what the fuck happened. They’ll spin up these discs, and see us fat, bloated, and giggling at cats on YouTube.

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