What the fuck is eleven seconds? Is that really a teaser? I don’t know, man. I ain’t hear to battle with you over the ontological definition of a teaser. I’m here to consume caffeine, make mistakes, and ingest pop culture. Like this (barely) teaser.

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Man. Nothing like getting paid on a Thursday and wanting to ransack Amazon for some neat things I don’t need. Only problem? Even with my Prime account that shit isn’t coming until Monday. (Unless you want to pay for one-day but fuck you.) This won’t hold! My American upbringing demands everything right now. Good Guy Amazon? Soon they’ll have my back.

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