#August2010

Wayne Newton Is In Fallout: New Vegas. We All Win. All of Us. You Too.

Motherfucking Wayne Newton is going to be in Fallout: New Vegas. It wasn’t like I needed another reason to be excited for the next Wasteland Party Romp, but with the reveal of the voice acting, god dammit I have it.

Kotaku:

Newton is in the game as the disembodied voice of a radio DJ long dead. Which is a bit of a shame. You’d think that were an atomic apocalypse to strike, the only things that would survive in Las Vegas would be cockroaches and Wayne Newton. And maybe Cher,

Other actors signed to lend their vocal talents to the game include Kris Kristofferson, Felicia Day, Ron Perlman, Michael “Worf” Dorn and…Matthew Perry.

Good god damn! Wayne Newton and every nerd’s dream girl Felicia Day in the same voice acting class?

Gamebreaker Cid Is Up on the PSN

tactics

Final Fantasy Tactics is up for download on the PSN. Final Fantasy Tactics is one of my favorite Final Fantasy games. When I first bought it, it broke me over its knee and left me for dead. Be gone, nub player it told me. And I nodded at it and left glumly. Years later I returned, a wizened young adult, ready to have his ass served to him repeatedly in the name of strategy. And by the end, with my legion of Monk/Ninjas, I was double-fist punching the shit out of every goon in my way. I still own my original copy, but if I didn’t, I would be on this like fanboys on Felecia Day.

Dollhouse Adds Whedon Fanboys’ Wetdream to Cast

summer

OMFG! Summer Glau, also known as the creepy fanboy wetdream River from Firely is joining the cast of Dollhouse.

According to the Hollywood Reporter:

“(Glau) will have a recurring role as Bennett, a Dollhouse employee who shares a secret past with Eliza Dushku’s Echo.”

Secret past? Can you say lesbian sex scenes interspersed with mind-numbing and heavy-handed exploration of identity? YES. Or probably not.
It’s ironic, right? Firefly gets canceled after one season, despite being excellent. Dollhouse, the biggest piece of shit I’ve watched on television in years gets renewed. Well done, Whedon zealots. You’ve saved this pile of high school philosophy and drama club dialogue. And your reward? Summer Glau! If anything, Whedon et company are doing a great fan service to the perennial virgins out there – getting them geeked out with appearances by first Felecia Day, and now Summer Glau. Get ready to fap, boys.

Felicia Day Is Only Hot When She’s Not Hot

The Guild is an online sitcom featuring esoteric jokes that only homos like me will get. This music video used to hype up Season 3 debuted like two weeks ago, which makes it five thousand years old in Internet time. Somehow I missed it.

However, watching it, I was pretty torn. First off, it features Felicia Day. However, it features Felicia Day trying to act, at least ironically sexy. Now, for nerds like me, Felicia Day is a dream. She’s a smart chick, with pale skin, who does stuff like star in Dr. Horrible, and cut episodes of Dollhouse. In short, she’s sexy because she’s not super seductive. I know it’s all tongue-in-cheek in this video, but I’m all, “Felicia Day is hot when she’s not trying to act conventionally hot.” I know I’m in the minority, and that many a nerds have laden their fingers with their spilled seed to this video.

As for the song, “(Do You Wanna Date My) Avatar”, it’s pretty cool. For the six people who get the references, and the loved ones they’ve subjected to their MMO playing. Like, for instance, I will get it, and all my friends will, but random people who stumble across it will be like “Jesus Christ look at these RPG fags.” Then they’ll go back to playing Madden 10 and trying shitty cheap beer in their frat houses.

Ha!