Everyone that tells the Brothers OL to lay off the caffeine and energy drinks can officially cram it!

Unless you were born in the 1800s, you undoubtedly realize that Frank Thomas is the greatest athlete of all time; check out the Big Hurt promoting the ultra-safe, certainly-good-for-you energy powder ZizZazz!

The energy boost was something I needed to play professional baseball.

That’s what we’re saying! Just about writing and reading and…uh…playing video juegos and whatnot.

[images & words is the comic book pick-of-the-week at OL. equal parts review and diatribe, the post highlights the most memorable/infuriating/entertaining book released that wednesday]

Nuclear threats. Satanic rituals. Daddy issues. Drug binges. Time travel. Ass-kickings.

No, I’m not calculating the formula for a Megadeth record, I’m listing some of the shenanigans that appear in Batman and Robin #16. Grant Morrison concludes his duties on the title by bringing Bruce Wayne back from the dead (or temporal instability, but same difference) and making unprecedented changes to the Bat-mythos. It’s fuggin’ wonderful.

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[DEFEAT. is Rendar Frankenstein’s truest attempt at fiction.   Presented in weekly episodes, the novella tells the tale of Daryl Millar – a hero who dies at the intersection of pop culture, science-fiction, war epic, and fantasy]

At the same time that Vanessa was giving a phone number to the most genuine and charming boy she had ever met (and 8-Bit was trying to figure whether it was the pizza or the waitress that induced his boner), Riff was beginning to tear his way through Skull Beneath the Skin. While the rhythm parts were now swiftly under his command, the ferocious leads were still putting his fingers to the test. But it was a test that was worth taking, an exam that once passed not only provided incredible bragging rights but a sense of self-worth.

And if you have self-worth it doesn’t matter what the hell the world says about you.

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Check out this footage from (what one has to assume is) the studio session for Between the Buried and Me’s new EP.

No more than a few seconds of music is heard and yet I’m still excited beyond belief.

Anyone with me?

[OCTOBERFEAST is the greatest celebration of the year, a revelry dedicated to pop-culture’s most nutritious Halloween detritus. Plastic screams and artificial sweeteners have never been more bountiful. In the old country, villagers refer to the extended party as Satan’s Snacktime]

If you’re reading this, you’ve survived long enough to reach the final day of OCTOBERFEAST. Congratulations. I can’t even tell you how many celebrants I’ve seen collapse halfway through, proving themselves too faint of heart to endure the satanic shindig. Terror-induced heart attack, alcohol poisoning, spontaneous combustion, sugar-coma – a ticket to this event also grants admission to death by about ninety-nine different methods.

But here we are – alive and demented as ever on Halloween! This day brings us the concluding activity, an event that anyone with a heart (even a black one) should enjoy taking part in. Today, for a few hours, we reverse the relationship between the dominated and the dominating. The powerless become empowered. The ruling class elite must answer to the disenfranchised. And in the process, boatloads of candy are consumed.

Tonight’s featured enterprise is, of course, trick or treating.

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[OCTOBERFEAST is the greatest celebration of the year, a revelry dedicated to pop-culture’s most nutritious Halloween detritus. Plastic screams and artificial sweeteners have never been more bountiful. In the old country, villagers refer to the extended party as Satan’s Snacktime]

It is with the utmost respect and admiration that I present the following declaration:

Ray Bradbury is the official writer laureate of OCTOBERFEAST. The awarding of this position to Mr. Bradbury shouldn’t shock or surprise a single soul, as his work is the printed embodiment of the annual fright-festival. The bizarre, the ghastly, and the speculative synergize to convey a sense of wonder and possibility.

This year’s gala features Ray Bradbury’s The October Country.

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Just read about this and wanted to share.

Apparently in 1987, someone wearing a Max Headroom mask pirated a Chicago-area TV signal and interrupted the regularly scheduled broadcast. The chaos that ensued can be found below. I can’t articulate why, but I love it.

I used to love life.

For a time, I hated life. I became cynical, dwelling only on what was wrong. Reveling in negativity. Perpetuating my own bleak outlook and poor attitude.

Then I came the closest I’ve ever come again to dying.

I now love life again. Perhaps more than I ever had previously. Today is Friday – as such, I’m going to celebrate my brief time on the ride with a beer.

Please join me.

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[OCTOBERFEAST is the greatest celebration of the year, a revelry dedicated to pop-culture’s most nutritious Halloween detritus. Plastic screams and artificial sweeteners have never been more bountiful. In the old country, villagers refer to the extended party as Satan’s Snacktime]

There is no doubt in my mind that Devin Townsend is a genuine, living, flesh-and-blood hero. The man was discovered by Steve Vai and sang on one of his records. He then went on to front Strapping Young Lad, a band whose heaviness is often imitated but never recreated. And his solo records include some of the most inspiring art I’ve ever experienced.

In short – HevyDevy is the goddamn man.

As a bit of a benevolent screwball, Devin Townsend has generated plenty of material that could make its way into OL’s annual celebration of undead-pulp-malarky. For a time, it appeared as though Ziltoid the Omniscient was going to stop by OCTOBERFEAST but he changed his mind when I told him that we weren’t serving coffee, only beer and soda. Oh well – his loss!

Luckily, a suitable replacement has emerged!

To support the Devin Townsend Band’s Synchestra, a video was filmed for the track Vampira. I’m almost positive that the song has nothing to do with Halloween, goblins or even the horror-icon after whom it was named. However, this didn’t stop the video from taking the form of a live-action Vault of Horror adaptation.

Set within the panels of a comic book, Vampira shows Devin Townsend (in the same devil costume worn in Problem Child) rocking out with his band of skeleton-men. As the troupe shred inside of a cemetery, they dance about with a fearlessness only possessed by evil musicians. And unlike the Misfits, these guys actually tear shit up.

Also worth noting is the vampire babe that shows up. She’s not a ten or anything, but for a member of the undead (and a star in a Devin Townsend video) she’s worth a look. Her inclusion can probably be attributed to the desire to include a title character. Whatever, I’ll take it.

It’s the Friday of OCTOBERFEAST. Pop on Vampira, tap your toes, and get ready for the most wicked weekend of them all.

[OCTOBERFEAST is the greatest celebration of the year, a revelry dedicated to pop-culture’s most nutritious Halloween detritus. Plastic screams and artificial sweeteners have never been more bountiful. In the old country, villagers refer to the extended party as Satan’s Snacktime]

I’m going to tell you a scary story.

When I was a little kid, there was a professional wrestling company called the WWF. Don’t look for them – they don’t exist anymore. This company had absolutely perfected the slop-culture art of pro-wrestling, creating a product that was as enthralling as even the finest piece of art. The good guys were the best. The bad guys were pure evil. And even the maniacs captivated. If you were an apostle of the WWF, it was a beautiful time to be alive.

But lurking about the dark underbelly of staged athletics was a different creature altogether. Relegated to filthy corners of sports entertainment, this abomination took umbrage at its second-class status. This being didn’t smile and shake hands. It didn’t kiss babies on the forehead and say “God bless.” And it sure as hell set any precedents.

This ghoul was called the WCW. And it was the malevolent doppleganger of the WWF.

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