#March2012
This VIDEO Shows Why ‘PHANTOM MENACE’ Lightsaber Battles Suck. Preach, Brah.
Even if you like The Phantom Menace and its fight scenes, this video is goddamn hilarious. God help you, but its still hilarious.
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BioWare Asks ‘DRAGON AGE’ Fans: PLEASE TELL US WHAT TO DO.
Man, BioWare is doing some serious soul searching. Hot off the gigantic dump (actually not too big, just a dungeon and a town) that was Dragon Age 2 and the cataclysmic reaction to Mass Effect 3‘s ending, the company is asking their fans what to do with the Dragon Age franchise. Is this awesome…or just sort of aimless and sad?
NEW ‘AVENGERS’ PICS: Cause Posing And Brooding Is Always Awesome
If there is one thing that is defining the marketing campaign for the Avengers flick, especially when it pertains to the pics released, it is a whole bunch of attractive people doing nothing. Just sitting. Brooding. Flexing. Boring. Don’t get me wrong I’m jazzed to the tits about the movie, but these pictures are equally boring and hilarious.
Hit the jump to bask in the banality.
‘WORLD OF WARCRAFT: MISTS OF PANDARIA’ TRAILERS: Sticky Furred Nonsense
I’m not going to stunt. Just like latex porn and obesity, World of Warcraft always calls me back. Always. So say what I will about the forthcoming expansion, “Misty Crotch Furry Jizz” (working title), I’m going to play it. Blizzard has seen fit to remind me of my hopelessness with these new trailers, which I laugh at, while crying that I’ll be Day 1-ing.
Hit the jump for the trailers.
Strange Moments in Solid Movies: Can You Read My Mind, Superman?
In 1978, a year after Star Wars catapulted audiences into the alien cosmos, Warner Brothers did humankind a solid by bringing the alien to modern-day America with Superman: The Movie. With the appropriately rousing–if not a bit biologically misleading (it’s marketing, people!)–tagline “You’ll Believe A Man Can Fly”, Richard Donner’s adaptation found the right balance between honoring the rich mythology of the character’s comic origins and reconfiguring it through the epic scope that only the big screen can hold. And thanks to this steady footing provided by the saga’s terra firma that stretches from the distant Krypton to Earth’s Smallville and Metropolis, it is no wonder why, when push comes to shove and heroics are called for, Superman can leap buildings in a single bound (and the like) into the stratosphere: the ground is set for success, which makes the flying leap that much more believable. Indeed, Superman takes off, soaring to immense heights as it is still one of the best comic book adaptations in film. (Slight tangent: its structure, still an unbeatable beacon for doing a great origin story, has “inspired”–or, more cynically, motivated the lazy–makers of subsequent comic films to follow Superman’s shining light too much, too closely, like moths to the flame. Some men just can’t fly well, it seems–and Superman’s mastery becomes all the more apparent.)
Microsoft Working On GAMING HELMET And GLASSES. Dystopian Smile.
The minds of the people have not been fully anesthetized yet, and that’s a problem. We’re getting fat, and wearing our fancy goggles, but we haven’t been fully claimed. Microsoft is working its asses off to up the Docile Consumer quotient, and god help them they may pull it off. Full-on gaming helmet.
Teaser For Mark Millar’s Comic ‘SUPERCROOKS’
Directed by Nacho Vigalando, I have a feeling this teaser for Mark Millar’s comic Supercrooks is going to be more entertaining than the rag itself. This is the comic whose tagline is “There are too many superheroes in America, let’s go someplace else”, confirming that every thought Mark Millar has on the crapper is now a movie-ready franchise.
Hit the jump to check it out.
New ‘BIOSHOCK: INFINITE’ Heavy Hitter: Boys Of Silence
Ken Levine and the rest of the team have revealed BioShock: Infinite‘s third heavy hitter: the Boys of Silence. A creepy deformed roaming analog of the original’s camera system. Fucking awesome.
Hit the jump to check them out.
THE PIRATE BAY Wants To Use DRONES To Put Servers In Sky. Futurism ++
Pirate Bay, man. They’re all, you know. Pirating. Torrenting. Naturally, the Man wants to bring them down and they need to devise ways to stay ahead of them. Their latest method is science-fiction porno, that is also a fitting middle finger to the Powers That Be.
New ‘HUNGER GAMES’ CLIP: Heartfelt Handsome Goodbyes
The video just keeps coming for Hunger Games, even as the movie stands three days away. In this clip we got Katniss hugging it out with Gale as she prepares to enter the Games frrealy.
