Views From The Space-Ship: King of the Man-Children

If you guys knew how fucking long it took me to make the gif above, you’d fucking roll your eyes. Like, way, way too long. Like, maybe twenty or thirty attempts. All so like six people can see the gif, one person can like it, and no one to hang out in the comments. But motherfuckers, sometimes you just gotta scratch that itch. Not in public, unless you got no qualms about digging ass in a crowd. And honestly? If you got no qualms, good for you.

I am no saint.

You see, I’m sure I’m known around the local gym as “the guy who absolutely rips ass on the elliptical machine” so I’m not one to judge. What, you want me to burn some k-cals with the bubble guts? Fuck that, dude. Especially since I can’t be stopping every time I rip ass to retire to the bathroom. On a Saturday? After a Friday night of debauchery? I’d never get anything done!

Live Fast. Rip Ass.

Live Fast. Eat Ass.

Two powerful, undeniable axioms.

Anyways, you’re not here to listen to me wax horny about analingus. I think? Regardless of the answer, the whole premise of this bitch is to share with you views from my world. Then I hope you’ll return serve in the comments section! I don’t know if you will, but I certainly hope so.

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.this shithead

One of the “perks” of remote teaching with pets is that they feel entitled to your space whenever they feel like it. See Exhibit A: Hadley. This bitch will scratch to get in should I kick her out, and proceed to snore for hours on the futon once she’s in. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t think she was cute, though.

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.desk view

I figure I might as well take a picture of my desk every week. Show you how it looks on a given Thursday. Peep the laptop/desktop gangbang happening. I teach on the laptop courtesy of its camera and microphone, but my heart lies with my far more comfortable desktop computer. The moment school is over for a given day, the ring light comes off, and the laptop is shuddered.

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.firestarter quote

Nothing special, just a quote from Firestarter that I particularly fuck with. Somewhat complimentary to my all-time favorite Kurt Vonnegut quote. Simple, straight to the point, and a great summary of my ethos. Fun book, too!

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That’s really it for me, friends! What does your neck of the woods look like this week?