The Dude’s High 5s: Top 5 80s Hair Band Ballads

Hello loyal OLers.  It’s time for another obligatory musical High 5.  As I’ve admitted in the past, I know nothing of music despite actually being able to play a few instruments (besides the skin flute).  Today we’re looking back at yesteryear towards a magical time known as the ‘80s.  It was an amazing time to be alive.  MTV played music videos, Saturday mornings were filled with quality cartoons, and Han still shot first.  Also our rock was filled with hair.  The bad boy image was all the rage.  However, beyond that tough exterior our rockers wanted us to know they had feelings and shit.  So here we go; my top 5 ballads by ‘80s hair metal bands.  [Note: While some of the songs may have been recorded outside of the 80s, the bands themselves existed as hair bands in the 80s]


5. Don’t Know What you Got (‘Till It’s Gone) – Cinderella

Cheesy lyrics?   Check.  Man playing a piano on a beach at sunset?  Check.  Guitar solo by a man in a duster?  That’s a big check.


4. More Than Words – Extreme

I don’t quite know what this song is about simply because I assume it is equal to more than the sum of its lyrics (Get it?  Its more than words!).  Its fair to say that if one heard this song for the first time, it would be hard to believe that the band’s name was Extreme.  I also have a soft spot in my heart for Extreme as they are a local band.


3. I Remember You – Skid Row

This is the ballad in disguise (or Power Ballad).  It still had a heavier sound so it may not seem like you are a pussy for listening to it.  The title is also ironic as no one remembers Skid Row.


2. Dream On – Britny Fox

If there was an equation to find the best example of what a cheesy ballad entails, this is it.  The video is ridiculous, the lyrics crude but effective, the instrumentation is clinical … it really is like a microcosm for the 80s itself.


1. November Rain – Guns ‘n’ Roses

This is the ballad perfected.  Some say that the day this was released that the hair band movement died.  It’s easy to see why.  Where else could it go?  Once Slash plays in front of the church during a windstorm in the middle of nowhere that was it.  Sorry guys, pack it up, its Grunge’s turn now.

So what ballads stick out in your minds?

Oh, and a special bonus shout out to Steel Panther for keeping the movement alive.