Star Wars: The Old Republic cost $33 zillion dollars to make. It didn’t make that back. Now it is going free-to-play up until level 50, and Blizzard is once again sucking the marrow out of the bones of a fallen competition.
BioWare Considering Free-To-Play For ‘STAR WARS: THE OLD REPUBLIC’, I Still Wouldn’t Care.
June 15th, 2012 by Caffeine Powered
Do you care about Star Wars: World of Sithcraft? I don’t. Would you care about it if it was free?
International Star Wars Fan Groups Accepting Old Republic Costumes As Canon. F**king Phew
March 19th, 2012 by Caffeine Powered
I had no idea that Star Wars fan groups had such sway. While George Lucas may have rubber-stamped (a stamp forged in his laboratories using dark magic and our tears) Star Wars: The Old Republic as canon, the fan groups weren’t so quick to give it their blessing. Rejoice though, people of the desirous SWTOR cosplay. The game has passed the Crucible.
WoW Sheds Another 100,000 Subscribes. Drops In A Bucket Add Up Eventually, No?
February 10th, 2012 by Caffeine Powered
WoW has an unfathomable amount of subscribers, but the MMO to End All MMOs continues to shed them like a colonic-and-amphetamine-powered winter weight loss program. Or something. It makes sense to me.
Press Start!: Yo BioWare, Open SWTOR The F**K Up.
January 13th, 2012 by Caffeine Powered
I’m about to vomit about the new Star Wars RPG. This is Press Start. If you don’t give a fuck about the title, I’ve strewn the following throughout the post to keep your attention: a hot dog eating contest, a wasted Han Solo, and if none of those fit your fancy, the conclusion of the post is a fat kid dancing. Isn’t that enough spectacle?
Allons-y.
SWTOR Bans Players For Like, Playing The Game.
January 3rd, 2012 by Caffeine Powered
I don’t know where Ilum is in SWTOR, but I shouldn’t be going to that fuckin’ place. No way. Not under level 40. If I go there, I’m going to get the Ban Hammer thunderously dropped on my ass.
SWTOR Logs Over 60 Million In-Game Hours. Blizzard, Wut Say U?!
December 28th, 2011 by Caffeine Powered
SWTOR is kicking ass. Taking names. Force chokin’ bitches. Electronic Arts is touting it as the fastest-growing MMO in history, and the Star Wars geek in me giggle in glee.
SWTOR Could Learn Something From Porn Site Billing, F**king Sh*t.
December 22nd, 2011 by Caffeine Powered
There are times when the blue-veined monster whispers nothing-sense to me. It coos at me, driving down my already dessiccated and marooned on the side of my consciousness sense of Rationality. It tells me to do things. From with the dank Dagobah that is my swampy set of boxer briefs, it commands me. Put in your credit card information. Click those buttons. Sign up for that porn site. Dance, monkey! Dance, dinky! Soon all shall be right with the world. Let the buxom shake, let the artificial moans wash over you. Spend your money, do it, do it!
Analysts: Star Wars: The Old Republic Big Risk for EA. Profundity!
December 21st, 2011 by Caffeine Powered
Star Wars: The Old Republic has run EA a considerable amount of imperial credits in development. Utilizing this knowledge and college degrees in nonsense and speculation, analysts have come to discern that it is a big risk for the company. Not particularly insightful, but the details about what they’d have to pull to make a profit is, thereby justifying my blathering here. Right? I hope?
BioWare Hopes Old Republic Lasts Decades. Good Luck With That.
July 26th, 2011 by Caffeine Powered
I’m going to let you in on a secret. Something inside of me tells me that SWTOR isn’t going to be good. I don’t know why, I just have the suspicion. The emphasis on voice acting and storylines? Give me grind quests and fucking dungeons! No, I have no idea. BioWare doesn’t share my skepticism. Maybe cause they made it or something. They think it’s going to last for decades. Decades.
