Duela Dent is coming to the New 52! Hide your kids, hide your wives. Jesus Christ, talk about a stale cultural reference. Fuck you, Caff! Anyways, yeah. Joker’s Daughter is coming to the refried DC Universe. Perhaps this excites you. Frankly, I didn’t even know the Joker had a daughter. I understand this is a cascading wave of comic book failure raising towards me.
Jesus titty-fucking a kangaroo, this is dumb. We’re not even a year removed from Avengers fighting X-Men fighting Tediousness, and we have DC doing their best imitation of the Event. Oh sure I’m sure there will be marginal differences, but come on. Come onnn. The only thing more played out than the ennui-inducing concept of a super team is having those teams that populate a company’s universe fighting one another.
I didn’t see this one coming. I suppose that isn’t surprising, since I cannot see much through the womb of caffeine and masturbating that I exist within. Neil Gaiman is returning to Marvel, and the good man is bringing Angela with him. Yes, that Angela. The one he co-created with Todd McExpensiveBaseBalls way back in the day.
Don’t ever start making sense, DC. I’d hate to take you pig-greasers seriously. Or rather, take the minds at the top making all the puke-covered decisions. I take a lot of the creative minds at the joint very seriously. The latest noise coming out of their Den is that they plan on pulling back on variant covers. This is said, of course, in light of the news that they’re dropping fifty-two variants for JLA #1.
Joe Madureira was like, the jam. Man. Way back in the day, I was obsessed with the guy. Then he stopped drawing watermelon boobs and hands the size of basketballs to tool around on other projects. Which is probably for the best, allowing me to not actively figure out how much I didn’t enjoy his style any longer. Now the dude is returning to comics though seemingly full time, and my past self is pretty excited.
Don’t really care for Famke Janssen one way or the other appearing in The Wolverine. What I do give a shit about is keeping her out of the First Class universe, but I’m not holding my breath. How do you folks feel?
Ooph! Now this is a beast of a creative team right here.
Eric Stephenson continues to dominate both the comic landscape and my heart. The Image Comics publisher has lobbed some bombs at Marvel’s current assy Super Event, pointing out the obvious: no one is going to give a shit in a decade.
The Fantastic Four reboot that is being helmed by Josh Trank has landed itself a writer by the name of Jeremy Slater. I am not familiar with this lad.
Ugh. Jesus Christ. Now Marvel is relaunching everything ever, shaking up creators teams and daring to address everything save for good stories. Maybe these new titles will be good, maybe they won’t. However you know what dominates hype? Just fucking quality storytelling. Just focus on it guys. Please. I’m begging you. The wave of hype will dissipate after we go “Wow! Relaunched bullshit that’ll devolve into status quo! This totally isn’t a response to the Blase 52!” and then things will return to functioning as a simmering churn factory for movie scripts.