Woman uses her breasts to smuggle cocaine. Enterprising ++

December 12th, 2012 by Caffeine Powered

If I have learned anything from Breaking Bad, it is that drug smuggling is the mother of invention. While not nearly as cool as using an entire chicken restaurant to smuggle drugs, this enterprising lass used something quite interesting. Her bub-bub cavities.

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JESSE PINKMAN and the curious case of the Showcase Showdown

September 14th, 2012 by Caffeine Powered


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MIKE from ‘BREAKING BAD’ playing Ben’s dad on ‘PARKS AND REC.’ Hell yes.

September 12th, 2012 by Caffeine Powered

Pop culture convergence of enormous boner magnitude! Mike from Breaking Bad is going to be all up in Parks and Rec. We haven’t earned such a momentous mash-up, but we’ll take it.

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‘SMASHED’ Theatrical Trailer: Ramona Flowers and Jesse Pinkman go Breaking Hearts.

September 11th, 2012 by Caffeine Powered

Terrible puns aside, I’m really looking forward to this flick. It’s all like, indie emotional and it has pretty actors and actresses that I enjoy looking at and rooting for and such.

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Video: ‘The Journey of Walter White’ reminds us he wasn’t always a f**k.

September 7th, 2012 by Caffeine Powered

Hard to remember the days when Walter White wasn’t Full Vader, right? This excellent fan video chronicles Chemistry Kid Lucifer’s descent into madness, and helps recall the days when I actually rooted *for* the guy. Feels like eons ago. Spoilers ahead, ya fucking turkeys.

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Video: ‘BREAKING BAD’ star Aaron Paul saying ‘bitch’ in Korean. In character. I vote yes.

August 30th, 2012 by Caffeine Powered

Jesse Pinkman. Love you. Love your propensity for dropping a meatily weighted “bitch” to punctuate a sentence. Saying it in Korean? Yeah, you got me over the top.

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Real dude named Walter White is wanted for cooking meth. The Multiverse is bleeding!

August 17th, 2012 by Caffeine Powered

Within the parameters of the Multiverse, everything that is possible is happening. Keeping that in mind, I ain’t surprised that Walter White has been busted for cooking meth. What concerns me is that the reality where that occurred is beginning to merge with our own. Gulp!

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‘BREAKING BAD’ graffiti. It’s mad old, but it is Sunday. Love it.

August 12th, 2012 by Caffeine Powered

Mad old, but I was thinking about it today, and never posted it. Love it.

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‘BREAKING BAD’ creator considering a SAUL GOODMAN spin-off? Fantastic.

July 19th, 2012 by Caffeine Powered

Saul Goodman getting his own show? Seems too fucking ridiculous to be true, and that is the reason I’d love to see it happen. Vinny Gilligan isn’t committing to anything, but that isn’t stopping him from talking about the possible adventure.

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Monday Morning Commute: Tie Dye Projectile Vomit!

June 25th, 2012 by Caffeine Powered

What’s up, fools? Would you know that Rendar Frankandbeans is straight up out of the country? Yeah, player. He’s on some magical mystery journey pretending he’s Ernest Hemingway or some shit. I have a nagging suspicion that he’s going to come back with the Great Grumpy White Guy Novel of the next century. Drop it on my desk and slap me across the face. It’s just brotherly love. With him meandering about, and the other of the OL Founding Fathers out of the country as well, I’m all alone.

I have no pants on. I’m eating laffy taffy by the bucketful. My children are quickly drying on my stomach. This is how life should be lived. Oh, who the fuck am I kidding? I have someone greater to answer to, one who inspires more fear and reverence than the two of them. Mrs. Caffeine Powered. Every day she’s with me is a fucking gift, one that I respect by only occasionally ripping ass and drooling on myself.

This column right here is MONDAY MORNING COMMUTE. Within the confines of this most Monday of columns, us capitalist grind monkeys share the various artistic afflictions that give us lives meaning amid the grind. For within these arts we cajole ourselves into enjoying ourselves, despite the banality of the everyday.

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