I’m torn. On one hand, I really want to go to Avengers Campus. On the other hand? All this jerking off to Marvel and other pop culture has me feeling like we’re stuck in some sort of permanent adolescence. Eh, whatever. The Amazon is burning, you’ve never been closer to death. Go have fun.

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I am deeply disturbed by how many fucking nerds cared about one enormous popcorn flick overtaking another enormous popcorn flick for highest grossing movie of all time. Especially since they’re both owned by one enormous corporation.

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So, like, my hypothesis: the Avengers take the fight to Thanos early in Endgame. They get their asses whupped, and eventually realize they need to use their brains and not their brawn (also, the Quantum Realm) to take down the Mad Titan.

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Whelp, we have the video finally. THANUS. Ant-Man killing Thanos through his ass. The internet is a good, horrifying, troubling place. But, I’m here for it.

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Man, just fuck me up with this unexpected Avengers: Endgame trailer, Marvel.

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Man, I can’t wait for this fucking movie.

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Yeah, I’m tired of talking about this too.

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My goodness.

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Fucking Avengers: Infinity War, dudes. I’ve been sweating it so hard, for so long. Goosebumps and teary eyes.  Speculations and postulations. It’s felt like the fucking May 4 release date is never going to arrive. But, good news for me. And you. We don’t need to wait that long anymore. Now it’s dropping on April 27, motherfuckers.

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This movie and its sequel are going to fuck me up so bad, and I cannot fucking wait.

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