Welcome to the very last High 5. Yep, this is it, the final one. Its been quite a journey we’ve taken. I will admit, there have been ups and downs, but I wouldn’t trade a minute of it for anything. You’re probably wondering why this is the last one huh? Well, the apocalypse of course, December 21st. We’ve got two days to prep. So I figure with my swan song I might as well walk you through some likely scenarios so some of you might survive to envy the dead.
If you’re an avid reader of my High 5s, and let’s face it, who isn’t, you’ll know I don’t like Christmas. People are angry. They are stressed out. They spend far too much money on gifts and over extend themselves. Its painful to watch. Now, that’s not to say I want to eradicate the holiday. I enjoyed the hell out of it when I was a kid, but now that I’m older I can see behind the curtain. Around this time TV stations start running the same holiday movies over and over and over and over. If I actually watched TV anymore it would be nerve racking. So here we go, my 5 favorite Christmas movies.
What if I told you we’re going to be attacked in two days? Would you believe me? I can’t tell the future, but I can tell the past. Wait, is it read the past or tell the past? Anyway, if you knew that an attack was imminent on this date in 1941, you’d be a hero … or more probably be arrested, imprisoned, and questioned as a spy. World War II is one of the pivotal moments in Earth’s history. It was a global event that nearly every country that exists today was effected by it. In high school, I couldn’t have been more disinterested in learning about this event. I think it was because I had history teachers that were bad at teaching history. However, I rebounded. I managed to piece together a working knowledge of how this event went down. Here’s how.
I don’t have much much in the way of a preamble. There are some other directors out there that I am am loving, but need a bigger sample size. Joss Whedon, Duncan Jones, and Rian Johnson would fall into this category. Anyway, here are my favorite directors.
What the hell? Is it time for another musical High 5? I hate these things. Oh well, nothing to do but dive into it. Half of the songs that I love are pretty much 1 hit wonders. While these bands may have other good songs, they really only had one hit. So please spare me the defensive arguments if I touch a nerve. I understand, I too love the Sundays, Letters to Cleo, Better than Ezra, Cake, Chumbawumba, The Verve, Harvey Danger, The Toadies, Deep Blue Something, Fine Young Cannibals, Space Hog, and so on … ok, maybe not so much on the Chumbawuba. So without further adieu, may favorite 1 Hit Wonders.
Happy belated Veteran’s day everyone. Its one of my favorite holidays. Even the most liberal of douchebags shut up and let the Military have their day. The armed forces have been great to my family and friends (and freedom) over the years. I’ve often said that I don’t have the right stuff to serve. I’m too much of an independent thinker and I don’t like absolute authority being lorded over me. However, if I did have to serve, this is the squad of folks I’d want around me.
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There’s a new Bond movie coming out at the week. You have no idea how much that tickles me. When I was a kid, TNT used to have the occasional “15 days of 007” and play them non stop for a fortnight. It was glorious. I’d watch them all over and over. To coincide with the release of Skyfall, I present to you all my favorite Bond Films. Please let me know what films in the series you all like. Of course if you’re not a fan of 007, please say why so I can Internet fight you in the most juvenile of fashions.
Happy Halloween everyone. Hopefully most of you will be spending the day watching cheesy horror flicks and handing out candy to children dressed as various characters from pop culture. I will not be doing either. I despise horror movies and I live in a neighborhood where trick or treating is not popular. However I’m willing to put my prejudice aside to bring you my top 5 iconic horror movie characters. Also, side note, I know virtually nothing about these characters, I am just shoehorning this one in there because it is Halloween and it makes sense. Feel free to lambaste me all you want.
We’re a week out from Halloween. I’m doing this High 5 as a public service for adults out there. Get your shit together. There will be hoards of children outside your house dressed as ghouls, goblins, politicians, and ghosts. If you give them raisins or toothpaste or anything that isn’t candy, yummy, tooth decay enabling candy, you’re in for some trouble. So here’s my top 5 candy products that should always be given out for trick or treating.
The thought of traveling through space scares the hell out of me. Not many things do, but that is one of them. To be immersed in the infinite blackness with no compass, putting all your trust in a computer that may or may not be correct is insanity. Why would anyone do it? Well, if I were forced into it, these are the spaceships that would make me feel slightly better about the whole ordeal.
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