Rendar’s was actually more provocative.
We’re a corrosive element.
No grandparents are spared.
Look at this sad ass shit. You know what’s been sitting in drafts for like, two months? Budrickton’s final Game of Thrones recap. I was perusing the OL back channels today when I came across it, and I was like four seconds from deleting it. Then I thought to myself, I will take it to the people. We all know how funky fresh his other recaps were, don’t we? So I implore you folk. The good denizens of OL. Help me guilt Budrickton into generating this final S2 wunder-fest. It’s not the recap we deserve, it’s the recap we need.
What’s up folks? It’s Captain Caff-Pow here aboard the Mothership Omega. You may have noticed things have been quiet lately, but I assure you we’re bringing ourselves up back to speed. I spent a lovely weekend afar in a land of cows, fresh air, and very, very, very low levels of caffeine. For a good four days, I could not see the Eyes of God. The mysteries of All were hidden for me. Now that I’m back, I promise to double-down on the jitters and re-up on the verbal diarrhea.
Blogging is hard. Blogging for three years straight is harder. Doing it all as a broke-ass graduate student grinding out a day’s content while trying to write papers and read motherfucking Jane Austen’s Northanger Abbey is limit break material. I’m not complaining, just explaining. So you see around Sunday evening when the chimes rung and it was time to saddle up to the computer, I just couldn’t fucking do it. Tired. Burnt out. Then a calamitous week from Hell struck, malware up our guts and our server down around our ankles.
Sometime whilst I slept during the night, dreaming of Jennifer Lawrence and liberal uses for gelatinous desserts, the Spaceship Omega quietly hummed across a threshold. While Sleep Ian was generating a point in the Multiverse where j-e-ll-o was sliding down nooks and crannies of Lawrence’s (praise be!) curvaceous body in a dimly lit but swank shaggin’ wagon, we hit a goal we had been anticipating for a while. We received our one-millionth unique page view.
In case you wonder what I can usually be found doing after midnight, when I should really be working on tomorrow’s content. These days it’s a bit too much of an obsession with Hunger Games Lady. I tried to class it up with a Vonnegut reference, but I’m pretty sure I’m just losing my mind.
Anyone else awake? I have pie and cardboard cut-outs of Katniss we can pretend are smiling at us.
[Caff note: We had the best month ever, then suffered a malware attack. I'm reposting this, cause goddamn we deserve to smile.]
OL has just suffered unto it the best month of traffic in its nearly three year history. With a week to go, during a short month. Everyone drink! Thanks, you perverts, pigs, and unfortunate passersby.