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Rumor: Wii 2 Has A Touchscreen Controller, Codenamed ‘Project Cafe.’

April 15th, 2011 by Caffeine Powered

When it rains Nintendo Wii 2 rumors, it fucking pours. After yesterday’s news that the console is going to be revealed at or before E3, today we get a new crop of rumors. Most interesting is that the controller is going to up the ante in douchebag gimmicky nonsense.

Joystiq:

The towering pile of rumors regarding Nintendo’s next generation console, supposedly to be announced at E3, continues to grow today with a report from French news site 01net (which divined the hardware specs of the NGP before its official unveiling). Citing unnamed sources, the site claims the system is currently codenamed “Project Café,” and adds that it does feature hardware resembling that of the Xbox 360, such as a three-core IBM PowerPC CPU.

The real meat of the report isn’t in the specs of the console, but rather, its controller. According to 01net, the peripheral will feature a six-inch single-input touchscreen — which corroborates a similar report published by CVG yesterday. The French site also says the controller features a standard set of buttons, a front-mounted camera (what?) and can even function as a Wii sensor bar, should the player choose to indulge in the console’s built-in backwards compatibility.

I’d rather punch myself in the fucking cock than watch the Motion Controls War continue to escalate. A touchscreen on the controller itself? C’mon Nintendo. How about you focus on giving us more than one fucking game a year worth playing, or getting third parties to give a fuck about you again.

Maybe?

  • http://www.omega-level.net/ Eduardo Pluto

    Ya, a major turnoff for me with new video games is the new tech. I am not big on touch screen stuff and all that junk. Nintendo DS was the first hand-held system by Nintendo that i didn’t get because I did not want to play video games with a toothpick.

  • Sterling

    As much as I’m disappointed in Nintendo, the single greatest originator of nerdgasms this side of comic books, it’s good for business. Ps3 is the most advanced of the technology, xbox is more adolescent focused online play and less technologically advanced, wii plays for family fun and kids. By each giant going to their respective corners it does create for an overall more vibrant gaming industry where each can be successful without DIRECTLY competing for the same consumer. Sony should continue to focus on deep narratives and advanced technology, dive as deep into that shit as they can, minimum length session on any ps3 game should 3 hours with the doors locked, windows shuttered and volume blasted. Let xbox try and re-capture the living room, media center family focus area with their kinect/windows media center and then still own the virginity of at least 75% of the 13-19 year olds in our country with the next online shooter in the Halo, COD tradition. Wii can handle the under 12, teeny twinks, and stupid RETRO fun, where 15 seconds of fun repeated over and over again is still entertaining until your eyes cross from 3d exposure. In the home market, Nintendo’s biggest competition for consumer $ is probably going to be tablets and mobile platforms of the next 5 years, especially since anyone can download an emulator on a tablet and play their old nintendo games for free from their couch. By adding a touchpad they enable 3rd party developers developing for mobile platforms to easily port to their system. This could be good, although it’s going to move Nintendo further away from direct competition with Microsoft and Sony.